i live for @TRULY_DOZING& #39;s Rimworld threads, so i& #39;m gonna make my own

first 4 people to comment get colonists named for them (after that i can see if there& #39;s a way to rename newcomers)
FUCK i& #39;m rusty i think u get 3 starting colonists? i guess i& #39;m about to find out (sorry frens)
i don& #39;t remember how to play but we& #39;re goin for maximum chaos, obvs
starting colonists: @thesravaka , @spiderfoods , and @TRULY_DOZING

we& #39;ve got a pyromaniac and a maximum cooking skill of 1

this should go well
our colonists have just crash-landed with their pet guinea pig milo

directly next to a timber wolf

we& #39;re gonna, uh, just ignore her for now
found an optimal place to settle-- some sturdy existing walls, fertile soil, and a geyser (that& #39;ll be useful later)

but what& #39;s this? some furniture?

...oh
colonists: deconstruct the sarcophagus or leave it as decoration?
bonding
an uneventful first night

here& #39;s hoping that wolf either self-tames or sees his way out
sravaka& #39;s first kill (it only took about 2 hours between shooting the doe in the neck and putting it out of its misery)

spiderfoods negotiates with some visitors and lands us a sweet new weapon
gee, i haven& #39;t seen milo around, i wonder what he& #39;s up t---ohmygod

...wait, false alarm -- different guinea pig
so it begins
relaxo pukes politely indoors while our visitors check out the digs

sravaka does penance
spiderfoods here with reassuring words
think i found the problem
a fellow named Travis crash-lands nearby--

sravaka rescues him and races against the clock to tend to his wounds
hm, maybe i should& #39;ve tossed the meals that poisoned relaxo https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="đŸ€”" title="Denkendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Denkendes Gesicht">
welcome to Clown Town

time to deconstruct the sarcophagus
...well that was disappointing.

it& #39;s just a pile of limestone.
huh, looks like sravaka& #39;s force-feeding our wounded guest one of those meals relaxo ate

...

i& #39;m sure it& #39;ll be fine
a local mat goes rad just as travis is taking his first walk since we rescued (and poisoned) him

sravaka has a moment
(wow, i don& #39;t think i& #39;ve ever accidentally typed a spoonerism before)
sravaka goes to rescue travis as he& #39;s taken unawares by the mad rat

sravaka, hold your fi-- nevermind.

travis is fine. i mean, he& #39;s dying (again), but at lest he didn& #39;t get shot.
relaxo got jealous of sravaka& #39;s bedroom so i had them swap bedrooms

hmm
a squirrel self-tamed! what shall we name her?
almost immediately afterwards, sravaka tamed a turkey! we& #39;re working our way up to tame salamander

turkey names for a lovely lady who likes stories about aliens?
You can follow @goblinodds.
Tip: mention @twtextapp on a Twitter thread with the keyword “unroll” to get a link to it.

Latest Threads Unrolled: