Have managed to successfully start to pull myself out of rock bottom after what has been the absolute worst year of my life filled with much trauma and the most dreadful events, so here is a thread on what has helped me in case anyone needs it or if it’s useful

Disclaimer: this is not medical advice, this is just what has helped me. Please listen to your doctors, psychiatrists and mental health team above a random 21 year old on twitter!!!!!

Context: I have bpd and experience severe anxiety and some psychotic symptoms when in high levels of distress ie hearing things, experiencing paranoia and mild delusions, losing rationality as well as having very violent nightmare.

Over the last three weeks I’ve been the calmest I’ve been in months, genuinely content and not confusing it with being in a state of energised hypomania, experiencing better sleep, stable moods, am not self destructive and been a lot more productive.

I had a very sudden and huge epiphany when I was at my lowest that I simply couldn’t live my life like this anymore and decided to focus all my energy on getting better (this is a lot easier said than done), and a lot of this occurred through lifestyle changes

1) Changing meds: a bit scary, but I’ve become a lot more rational, grounded and calmer since changing. Definitely has decreased levels of distress and have helped with physical symptoms

2) Cutting out booze-alcohol is a depressant and I was binge drinking far too much far too often and getting into too many embarrassing and even dangerous situations. Cutting out alcohol has been the biggest lifestyle change, I feel calmer, sleep better, have more enjoyable-

-days and evenings out, am a lot less impulsive and my friends and family are far less worried about my safety and state of mind. My body and mind are thanking me for it, so many benefits (watch Melanie Murphy on YouTube for more who is sober and amazing)

3) Journalling-writing my thoughts daily has made me a lot less anxious, it’s also really lovely to look back on your day and realise not everything was shit and actually a lot of things made you smile. I like to write down dreams and goals

4) Meditation-I try to meditate for half an hour in the morning and then before bed. I used to have the most busy and chaotic mind, but meditation has helped me clear it a bit more and control my thoughts, I’m a lot more at peace with my mind now and a lot less anxious. Would-

-recommend guided meditations on YouTube for beginners. If you’re more spiritual, meditate with crystals and look for more spiritually led meditations

5) Exercise-I commit now to an exercise plan and try to exercise 4-5 days a week even if it’s very very light or gentle. I do running and cycling for cardio and listen to solely upbeat T Swift or podcasts (love Fearne Cotton’s and Rose and Rosie’s)

-would recommend Couch to 5k, gentle yoga (I love yoga with Adriene) and starting gently on a stationary bike if you’re starting out. Be gentle with yourself, be kind to yourself. Working out in public can be daunting, but I promise you no one is looking or judging you

6) Sleep-I try to stick to a sleep schedule. I have a night time routine where I switch off all devices an hour before and focus on reading, journalling and meditating before bed. If I’m not sleepy, I have Twinings sleepy tea and spray lavender spray on my pillow

7) Diet-I try and eat healthier now. I really value the process of creating a really lovely meal from scratch and then eating it, and try to eat mindfully and slowly. I wake up earlier to cook a nice breakfast and cut up fruit. I cut down on processed foods

8) I try and spend less time on social media, I’ve deleted social media apps, deactivated accounts for a while. I have a new Instagram where I only follow people on similar journeys to myself (mental health recovery, sobriety and health/lifestyle blogs) and friends and-

-controlling my consumption more has helped so much. I watch the news less (still aware, but not constantly), am less engaged in the online sphere of party politics, spend less time on my phone. I try and watch vloggers who are more authentic-I really love Melanie Murphy-

-Lana Blakely, Kelly Stamps, Fairyland Cottage, Girl in Calico. I love vloggers who speak about minimalism and slow/intentional living

9) Minimalism-hear me out, it doesn’t mean throwing out everything, but being more mindful about your purchases. My £300 asos hauls never gave me happiness, rather more anxiety when I had an overflowing closet. I’m trying to invest more in high quality and versatile pieces

and therefore saving money and space. Having a tidy room = a tidy mind. Lots of other people online phrase minimalism a lot better than I do

10) I’m trying to save more and invest more towards things which mean something to me. I’m using the money I’ve saved from going sober (not just booze, but ubers from central London, drunk takeaways, cigarettes etc) to go towards my new tattoo and buying myself flowers

After that, I’ll have enough saved for Christmas presents and then hopefully a solo trip once we all go bAcK tO nOrmAL

11) I try and focus more on the present, I try and live mindfully and intentionally. I love my job, but being so terrified about becoming unemployed three months later made me not appreciate the opportunities it had given me and how great it was. I’ve had so many moments like-

-That where fear of the future has stopped me from appreciating the present. Practicing gratitude more has really helped me with that

12) Therapy which tbf should be number 1 but I forgot lol. I have an incredible therapist, but the difference is now I actively engage. I do my DBT homework, I challenge my thoughts more regularly. I’m honest with my therapist about even the most dark and embarrassing

things and don’t have that shame and hesitation i once had. my therapist is very honest with me and it’s what i need to hear

13) I value my relationships. I always have done this, but especially in very dark times, I’ve found a new appreciation and love for those who stood by me and actively encouraged more healthy lifestyle options even when I was hesitant (esp about sobriety)and I’m forever grateful

14) I stopped trying to live for others and started living for myself. I used to think “my loved ones don’t deserve this” when I was ill but in reality *I* didn’t deserve this either. I tried to value myself a lot more, i tell myself positive affirmations everyday, I make plans-

-without even telling anybody if I know it will make me happy and make my soul happy

15) I started doing more things young child me loved doing-I went to the farm and it was the best day, I went to see a candlelit string quartet who played songs I used to play when I was in an orchestra. It’s really healing

16) I try and do more daily acts of kindness and never expect anything in return. It’s nice to be nice

17) I’m more reflective. I take responsibility and accountability when I’ve been shit. I try and make amends, my behaviour is a lot less erratic and more responsible in every situation.

18) I deleted dating apps because I’m tired of entertaining dull conversations with people I have nothing in common with other than the fact that we’d both probably be happy with seeing each other naked

19) I learnt to start to forgive myself. I learnt to forgive drunk me who was hurting so much and drank as a form of numbing and in turn did so many things she regretted. I forgave the paranoid me who did things or thought things because of how badly others had treated her in-

-the past and her reactions were rooted in fear of that happening again. I learnt to forgive depressed me who spent days in bed not moving. I learnt to start to treat myself like I would treat my child, with love and care but also with discipline if needed

20) I started to accept that things happened to me and I can’t change that. Maybe I’ll never know why they happened to me, maybe some things don’t have reasons and life can just be shit, but what I can control is where I go from there, and I’m trying to make that somewhere nice

this has been a long thread lol. I write more about recovery, sobriety and wellness on my Instagram. I’m not a professional, but I found these sorts of blogs so useful when I was first diagnosed. I try not to be triggering and generally focus on positivity https://www.instagram.com/woahthatsmental/