Okay! Here we go! Cats (2019) songs ranked by horniness: https://twitter.com/clapifyoulikeme/status/1304999490496196608">https://twitter.com/clapifyou...
18. Memory. This is not a horny song. It is pure and heartbreaking and I will cut you if you try to ruin it.
17. Memory [reprise]/Beautiful Ghosts (Reprise). This is a tiny bit more horny than the original Memory because Victoria and Old Deut are there now, but it is still pure, and if you don& #39;t tear up at "TOUUUUUUUUCH ME" you have no soul (I& #39;ve got PLENTY of soul!).
16. Beautiful Ghosts/The Moments of Happiness. I don& #39;t care enough about the Best Original Song That Wasn& #39;t to properly rank it so honestly idk it& #39;s whatever; The Moments of Happiness is really just Deuti talking but she does kind of start coming on to Victoria at the end...
15. This is just a little ditty. It is not horny. Growltiger is not a "girl in every port" kind of cat. He is also not into Bustopher, even though I know in my heart that there& #39;s a 50K slow burn enemies-to-friends-to-lovers fic out there somewhere.
14. The Journey to the Heaviside Layer. Nothing terribly horny going on here, sorry. It& #39;s v pure, we& #39;re all so happy for Grizabella that she gets to die. But also it& #39;s still Cats (2019) so everyone in the background is maybe gonna bang.
13. Grizabella: The Glamour Cat. Despite being about how Grizabella was (apparently a very successful) sex worker, there& #39;s not much horn happening here. Unless you& #39;re into Demeter and Cassandra being bitchy, which Victoria may be actually...
12. Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats. It& #39;s the opening song, so they try to convince us this is going to be a weird-but-family-friendly movie. It kind of works! But ๐ญ๐ธ ๐ท๐ธ๐ฝ ๐ซ๐ฎ ๐ต๐พ๐ต๐ต๐ฎ๐ญ.
11. Mr. Mistoffelees. Victoria is ready to throw Misto down and bang him right there ofc, and they& #39;re all very Excited when O.D. gets back, but honestly this one is a lot less horny than it *should* be. There should be much more thrusting to encourage the magic cat.