My cat who can let himself out the back door, caught a chipmunk and carried him into the house and now they are both trapped in my son's room and wth do I do?

Chipmunk is moving tho probably sustained internal injuries.

No one yell at me! This is Iowa!

Should I light the house on fire?

Also my Roomba got stuck on a face mask and today is just filled with problems.

THIS IS WHY PEOPLE LIVE IN CITIES

The bedroom is on the second floor. I'm just down here trying to decide if I should mix a stiff drink and intervene or mix a stiff drink and stay away

Reminder. Waffles full name is Sir Waffles and this is conduct unbecoming to his station!

I have mixed a drink. And I have decided to intervene. If I don't tweet again my cause of death was chipmunk

I went upstairs. Gloved. With a box. And the CHIPMUNK IS GONE. It is nowhere to be seen. This is the worst possible outcome. WHERE IS THE RODENT???

Oh god. Oh god. A bloody angry rodent now slinks through the walls of my home seeking revenge.

There is no way that chunky chipmunk was swallowed whole by my cat. The only thing I can do is arm myself and wait for the chipmunk's revenge

JFC Waffles how dare you not handle this mess

Update. The chipmunk ran by while I was cleaning the first floor. I screamed. It's in the basement now. I made a homemade trap with peanuts. My dog seems to be chewing part of its tail.

No sign of the chipmunk, whose name is now Charles. I guess he sleeps here tonight

I did one more sweep of the basement looking for Charles. Discovered my washing machine is broken. And you know what? Charles can have this house. It's his now.

Waffles is on my shit list. HE ISN'T SIR WAFFLES ANYMORE!

omfg why did I think I could be a home owner?

Reminder this was just a few weeks ago https://twitter.com/lyzl/status/1296152826272518145?s=20

Good morning. Woken up by the shouts from my son. CHIPMUNK! So I throw my contacts on grab the box and run into the living room. Good morning, Charles!

I managed to corner Charles and force him into a box. But idk of you know this Charles can LEAP. He lept out of the box and scrambled over the floor. And then my dog chased him while the kids screamed in my bedroom.

Now we are off to grab donuts, coffee and a live trap.

Back home with donuts. And coffee and I set up a humane trap with the name Havahart. I set it near the fridge because based on Waffles (the trap not named Havahart) movements we think the chipmunk is under the fridge.

We go outside to clean the backyard from storm damage. Tree people are here. I tell them the whole story. They're pissed at Waffles for all of this.

As I clean the backyard with the kids all of a sudden my daughter says quietly, "Waffles killed the chipmunk Charles." I look over. Sure enough. RIP Charles. Waffles you sociopathic monster.

It's over? Nope. A few seconds after that picture, I see waffles chase a chipmunk up a tree. Surely it's not Charles. But I went and looked in the spot and Charles is gone! He has risen!! AND FREE

Assuming there is no Charles II, this story is over. Waffles is back inside. The tree crew is laughing their assess off at me. I need a breakfast beer

Honestly, Charles' journey feels very 2020 and if I take comfort in anything it's that he got away.

Oh and on Aug 10 my town was destroyed by what was the equivalent of a Category 4 in-land hurricane. All the wildlife is confused as hell and hence the tree repair crew.

Cheers to Charles. The real hero.

I regret to inform you all this story is not over. Today at noon I walked out of my office to see ... A CHIPMUNK (Charles? Charles II?) Running into the bathroom. I calmly shut the door and went to get the live trap and put it in the bathroom then left to run errands

I am back and look at what we have here. A chipmunk missing part of his tale.

And I was gonna do a dramatic release video. But as I carried the live trap out to the yard. He pushed open the door (??) and lept out. Bye, Charles. You are this year's only hero.

More video. But it's vertical. So no one yell.