Someone over at Mastodon was wondering if it was possible to transmit DSL over a banana. I did not have one at hand, but found an alternative.
I cut one of the two DSL copper strands, in half and pushed it into an apple.

Well, it works. With astonishing high data rates.

I& #39;m not joking, please try this at home, it works!

There& #39;s one caveat: This probably only works well with DSL Lines using Vectoring. In my case it& #39;s DSL profile 35b, which uses fancy DSP processing magic to reduce crosstalk and noise.

Expect some fruit & vegetable DSL benchmarks. We have numerous different modems and DSLAM line cards at our test lab at work.

I got several requests on how fast potato internet is, so I plugged one between the second DSL wire.
Didn& #39;t even cost much bandwidth, still about 175/39 Mbit/s! Definitely some HF-magic going on here.
The apple doesn& #39;t seem to be too happy about the heat in the cabinet, though.

Under normal circumstances (say: no food connected to my modem) my line syncs to ~205/45 Mbit/s, btw.

Because there were some questions regarding my cabling: I wired the line to pin 4 & 5 of an 8P8C (falsely known as RJ45) socket. I stripped away the extra wires for this photo.

Lost ~90 Mbit/s over night :(