Kid, realizing that another kid from his class is actually in school with the teacher: WHY does he get to go and Im HERE with THESE PEOPLE?!

Im "THESE PEOPLE," in case you weren't sure.

Me: Some parents chose to send their kids to school. I...did not.

Kid: Well, you failed me.

Now the kid at school is taunting the other kids by reminding them how cool the classroom is.

Unfortunately, he's forgotten how vicious my kid is.

Also unfortunately, I taught my kid how to unmute.

Kid: Oh look at him, playing with my favorite toy. I HOPE YOU GET DIARRHEA!

Me: Just don't wish other sicknesses on people. Covid isn't funny.

Kid: MOM. I dont want him to die.

Me: Okay, good.

Kid: I just want his butthole to burn.