There& #39;s a particularly unpleasant experience that it seems like most people who are (cis?) male feminist nerds have at least some of, which is that they& #39;ve internalised the idea that their being attracted to women is in some sense morally bad.

Combination of growing up in an environment where "X is attracted to a girl!!!" is treated as a hilarious subject of bullying plus a lot of feminism acquired as an adult telling them that it& #39;s almost impossible to hit on women without being an oppressor.

The reality is that being attracted to people is good and honestly it& #39;s not that hard to ethically hit on someone, but this can be a hard message to internalise.

(This isn& #39;t a feeling that just affects men, there just seems to be this specific combination that leads to it reliably)