I threw some sushi in the trash, forgot about it, and developed a fly problem. I discovered I can use my Dyson cordless vac to suck up flies mid-flight

Now I’m creeping around my house holding the vac like an AK-47 while I hunt flies and I swear it’s fun and I am not insane

I don’t know how I got so many flies, but I got the first 8 easy.

The remaining ones seem to be a more advanced form with faster reflexes, or are communicating and evolving, because I cannot catch them

But this is basically the best real-life video game ever

@Dyson and @ralphmacchio need to make a conmercial or movie out of this

They are taunting me. Quickly going flying in the outer edges of my vision and then disappearing. Or just holding still as if they are injured, and then taking off at the last second

God help me if they evolve like in Jurassic Park and start hunting me

I smashed my foot into a counter chasing one. I’m starting to feel as if they are messing with my psyche. They sacrificed their weak in order to lure me into their game

They are hiding. I keep flushing them out by walking around and revving the vacuum engine

One of them landed RIGHT NEXT TO ME as I type this. They are no longer afraid

I almost took out a chandelier with my vacuum.

I am starting to worry that this may become a Pyrrhic victory, If even a victory at all

I had Lasik eye surgery several years ago to improve my vision

All these years I have been preparing myself to defeat the flies

The vacuum is no longer effective. I am now twisting up dish cloth into a whip a la Indiana Jones. I have great hope for this technique

SUCCESS.

Got 2 of them with the towel.

Then reinforcements were called in and they are now mocking me

My energy is running low

I was supposed to be working on a research manuscript but have instead spent the last 2 hours fly hunting

For all of you who keep recommending a shop vac: I have one. It’s got a cord and is bulky and no way I could stealthily stalk flies through my house with it

I am intrigued by this salt gun thing. Someone send me one