au in which literature student dazai gets way too drunk one night and accidentally breaks into the wrong apartment — an apartment that belongs to port mafia executive chuuya

The moment Chuuya enters his apartment, he knows something's off.

His security system didn't send him any notifications, but he's well aware that a capable thief could override it if they put their mind to it, no matter how expensive it was. It's not that.

It's the way his doormat has shifted several inches to the right. Chuuya has by no means an eidetic memory, but noticing small details — especially ones that don't /fit/ — is part of the job. Of course, there are also /the shoes/ that are a big giveaway.

As far as he remembers, he didn't buy a new pair of doc martens, let alone throw them halfway across his hallway.

It's at this point that Chuuya wonders what kind of thief is stupid enough to leave his shoes behind, not to mention, why he would escape barefooted.

Several steps and a turn into his bedroom later, he discovers that the shoes weren't exactly left behind.

The thief's just still here.

Chuuya enters his room, and sure enough, there's an actual person in his bed. Sleeping. Snoring, even.

…

Throughout the last seven years of his life in the mafia, Chuuya never encountered an enemy like this: peacefully snoring in his bed.

He feels himself hesitate before jumping into action. Is this some sort of twisted strategy to get Chuuya to relax?

Chuuya takes one look at the intruder — young, dark hair, bandages all over his body — and frowns. No way in hell is this something serious to deal with. Right?

Only way to find out, he thinks, as he starts shaking the boy's shoulder because even if he looks like a harmless kitten that wandered into the wrong home, Chuuya still wants a peaceful rest of the night after dealing with bothersome foreigners the whole day.

There's still blood under his nails. He needs a shower, damn it, not /this/.

"Hey, you," he says, shaking the guy's shoulder. "Wake up!"

For a moment, nothing happens. Then the stranger lets out a low whine and buries his face in the sheets,

hugging one of Chuuya's spare pillows to his chest.

Wow.

Chuuya lets out a sigh.

This is annoying.

He had plans for today — cook something nice for himself, catch up on the drama he's been watching and maybe jack off; it's been a while, damn it.

None of these plans included a fucking stranger in his bed.

It's not like this is an actual issue. Chuuya's a damn mafia executive for fuck's sake. One call, and ten minutes later, this kid will find himself in one of their dungeons, getting questioned until

every last secret spills from his lips. Hell, Chuuya doesn't need his men. It would take him less than a minute to make the guy talk himself, but… something tells him that if Chuuya were to throw him out in the middle of the night — this drunk and vulnerable —

this boy wouldn't come out alive or whole.

Of all people, Chuuya knows best what can happen to passed out people alone at night. He refuses to close his eyes and let it happen to someone else.

So he grabs a chair and a book and sits down a few feet away. If the poor drunk so much as moves the wrong way, Chuuya will know.

In a way, he's even a bit thankful for this intrusion — aside from his plans that got ransacked — because he finally catches up on the book

he's been reading for months now.

Chuuya has just reached the final epic battle when he feels the man stir with a slight groan. It takes a few seconds of yawning, stretching, and blinking before he ever so slowly opens his eyes. He stares.

"This... isn't my dorm."

Chuuya snaps the book shut. "No, shit."

"Where…" He trails off with the shake of his head before sitting up properly. "Who are you?"

"The owner of the apartment you broke into."

That takes a good moment to register before he scratches the back of his bandaged neck.

"Heh. Funny."

"Not at all," Chuuya replies. "If this was anyone else, they could have shot you on sight. Or called the cops."

"Well, why didn't you?" It comes out a bit slurred.

That's a good question. Aside from the fact that Chuuya's in the mafia and