This is something I've been wanting to do for a while, so bear with me while I post all of this because I'm pretty upset just talking about this, to begin with.

Normally I'm not one to be serious, but I've been afraid to speak up about my feelings.. until right now. I need to voice my story. This is a callout/rant/whatever you want to call it about @ raythebuck1, and how I was manipulated by him.

So this all starts way back in June of last year. We had been talking for a little while, and I eventually let him know about my feelings for him with nothing to lose. He told me he felt the same way and we got in "a relationship" We "dated" for six months.

Once it became official, he stated that he wanted to keep it just between us, which at the time I thought was reasonable considering we were 2 minutes into the relationship, but eventually never did. For all those 6 months, no one knew. I did tell a select few I trusted about it-

-since I was happy to be in it, but those people certainly had their doubts.

One of the people I told about this (not mentioning their name for privacy sake) had warned me about what had happened in past times, stating he would lead people on with lies. The example they specified was the fact he would boast about his weight and how big he was-

-but showing nothing about it. Obviously, I didn't want to doubt Ray, but I also didn't want to ignore what my friend had just told me, so I pretty much had myself between two different people.

My relationship with Ray started out fine, but eventually, red flags would pop up. He really had his go-to excuses, the most notable one being him having headaches and fainting. He pretty much complained about headaches and feeling faints every day it seemed like. I obviously-

-worried at the time, but it became an excuse he pushed.
"Wanna VC together on Discord?" "Sorry hun, headache" Stuff like that. He even at one point mentioned he had fainted and was out for 2 days. He never really seemed concerned, never got medical attention, didn't worry about-

-listening to the advice I tried to give, but "it's fine"

I did mention that I wanted to visit at some point, but once again excuses. He had mentioned wanting to do this too, but the typical response was that the "vacation guy" was not there to book it. He even said that "the vacation guy went on vacation" and I was naive enough to-

-believe that. Despite everything that had went down, I still wanted to believe him, even with the doubts I had.

The main big thing is getting a commission together. I had wanted to get one with him since we were together, and that we'd be able to have something to represent us being together. Whenever I would ask, he would tell me to save my money for other things, even though I stated-

-numerous amounts of times that I just wanted one commission with him. During the six month period, he would upload commissions
with other friends of his, and when I asked about it, he mentioned that they were "old commissions", basically saying they were done months beforehand

And finally, the raffle he held. I was pissed because he knew I wanted to get a commission with him, yet he was fine getting one with someone he doesn't even know... well, that's what we all thought. When the results for the raffle came out, it pretty much revealed itself to be-

-rigged. Out of three-hundred and forty who participated, three well-known people in the fat-fur community ended up winning. The odds of that happening are way too low, and basically, by that point I had enough.

I confronted him about his lies and how upset he made me by saying them. He mentioned he didn't know what to do and that he was scared of people hating him (excuses btw). He then said something so bizarre I never knew how to react to and to this day still find it questionable-

-as to why he said it... telling me he would go to Japan for a month to "get his thoughts sorted". Going across the globe to clear your head. Gee vacation guy, you finally showed up! And in case it wasn't clear, he never left for Japan.

At that point, I had enough. I told him that our relationship was over and that we needed to move on. His reaction to that was unphased, and I could even say he was happy it was over.

I was heartbroken due to him lying about anything he said, which quite frankly included having feelings for me to begin with. Just when I thought everything was over, something else popped up.

A couple months later, another friend of mine (again not mentioning them for privacy sake) came up to me wanting to know what happened between me and him, as they had been friends with him for a bit, and I told him about the things he did.

I had asked him what kinds of things he talked about with them, and they mentioned it was heavy flirting and sexual RP's, which he did to me, and seems to do with everyone else. They also stated that he thrives on people liking him and twitter likes and that he had to convince-

-him to get a commission with them together for a while due to his "popularity status" That was the end of the line.

Almost a year later, and I finally have the courage to speak up. I've been wanting to for a while, and I'm glad I can say I did. And I can vouch for someone else who's dated him before. What happened to me happened to them too.

Ray, if you're reading this somehow, I leave you with this. I gave you way too many chances for you to hurt me, and you took every opportunity you could to do so. You made me feel like someone cared about me and gave me the confidence to put myself out there more, but it was-

-nothing but a hoax. I'm broken by you. What you did to me can never be taken back, but if you think you can go around doing the same things to other people, you're sadly mistaken.