Read on Twitter
1. Hello and welcome! It’s episode 313 of #MrMrsBetterHalf. Mr. & Mrs Better Half is designed to strengthen marriages & relationships that will lead to marriage, with wisdom from God& #39;s Word.
2. In the last episode, we discussed the issue, “Ambition is not the monster” Missed it? Catch up here: https://wakelet.com/wake/C7lUnVyJFNEPU3tM8lo0X">https://wakelet.com/wake/C7lU... #MrMrsBetterHalf
3. This week’s situation is “How to deal with a breakup”. Breakups – both for single and married people can be hard to deal with. For this episode, however, I will be speaking more to the singles. #MrMrsBetterHalf
4. If you were in a relationship at the start of the year, you might have had high hopes of it ending in marriage or at least an engagement. The fact that instead, you are ending the year with a breakup can make an already tough situation worse. #MrMrsBetterHalf
5. If you feel like your biological clock is ticking, you might be frustrated at the reality of starting all over. The first date, getting to know a new person, dealing with the awkwardness, butterflies, vulnerability and hoping it all won’t be a waste of time. #MrMrsBetterHalf
6. However, breakups at the end and beginning of a year are more prevalent because people are rethinking their lives and making resolutions about their futures. These decisions can also mean ending certain relationships. #MrMrsBetterHalf
7. The truth is that evaluation is encouraged. As a pastor and leader, I have been encouraging people to rethink and reset their lives for better productivity and alignment to God’s will even as this year comes to an end. #MrMrsBetterHalf
8. The challenge, however, is that in the name of re-evaluating their lives sometimes people make irrational, emotional decisions that can hurt rather than help them. So please take your time and think clearly before making decisions. #MrMrsBetterHalf
9. Generally, it is better to be the initiator of change than for change to happen to you. For instance, it is better to resign than to get fired. Or leave the business sector before it goes down. Losses tend to hit hardest when you were not prepared for them. #MrMrsBetterHalf
10. To be the initiator of change, you must be sensitive to the environment. Ask yourself how things are going in your relationship. Are things working? Are you moving forward and getting deeper in your commitment? Or are you just coasting? #MrMrsBetterHalf
11. I have seen singles who were seemingly blindsided by a breakup - especially when they had been dating for years. Many times, the signs were there. Nothing was moving. The relationship was stagnant, but they either didn’t notice or turned a blind eye to it. #MrMrsBetterHalf
12. It shows a lack of sensitivity to be totally blindsided by a breakup. While some people are expert deceivers, there& #39;d have still been signs that you or loved ones could have seen. That& #39;s why it’s good to have people around you even when in a relationship. #MrMrsBetterHalf
13. Sometimes you know that something is wrong, but you choose to be complacent or don& #39;t want to be the initiator. Some people don’t want to be the villain, so they wait for the other person to break up. This is not about sensitivity but a lack of courage. #MrMrsBetterHalf
14. When you see a problem and you choose not to fix it, you immediately brand yourself the victim. Life happens to you; you don’t happen to life. That’s not the best way to live. You should be a catalyst for change. #MrMrsBetterHalf
15. Now it’s important to note that I am not advocating for you to break up if your relationship is not working. I’m advocating that you should recognize when change is needed and act accordingly. A stitch in time saves nine. Better to be proactive than reactive. #MrMrsBetterHalf
16. Have a conversation with your partner on how your relationship is doing and where it is going especially as the year ends. If something needs repairing, face it. Are the issues with trust, honesty, care, accountability? Address them and find the way forward. #MrMrsBetterHalf
17. Ask pertinent questions. What are we doing in 2020? Is this the year of marriage? (It doesn’t have to be but what is the plan?) What does the future hold? What do we need to get there? How do we make ourselves better? Are we becoming better or bitter? #MrMrsBetterHalf
18. If your relationship is not growing, it’s dying. That’s the way life is. Change is evidence that there is still life, and you want good change, not a bad change. Remaining at status quo should not be an option. #MrMrsBetterHalf
19. I must also mention that sometimes you can misinterpret the relationship and mislabel friendship, romance. Just because you are great friends with someone doesn’t mean you have to marry him or her. #MrMrsBetterHalf
