Have you ever been on the receiving end of a Twitter pile-on? I have, on a number of occasions, so I just want to give you an idea of what it’s like.

It usually starts out with you making some genuine transgression. Something that does require an apology or a walking back. 1/

The transgression gets fixated upon by some smallish group, usually one with whom you’re debating something else. You may know you’re wrong, but you don’t feel like prostrating yourself before this group, because people are people and this is Twitter. 2/

Problem is, the group is fixating on some real thing you’ve fucked up with, and they’re QTing it out to all their followers. These new people see the fuck up and your unwillingness to apologize out of context, and that makes you look really bad. 3/

All of a sudden, you’re getting a bunch of hits and comments appalled at your behavior. Most of them aren’t being even-keeled and you’re already in a fighting mood, so you just start debating with these people too. 4/

Everybody wants an apology. Why won’t you apologize? Your unwillingness to apologize is taken as evidence of your shittiness. Except here’s the thing: Nobody actually wants an apology. That’s not fun. 5/

When you do realize how far out you’ve gone and offer an apology and admission, it’s not good enough. It’s insufficient, and the fact that it came so late is proof that it’s not genuine.

But now they’ve drawn blood. This draws more people looking to get in on the fun. 6/

You get a dizzying amount of replies. Some seemingly sincere pleas to discuss. Others just angry jabs. A lot of times it’s not even about this incident anymore. It’s about something before. Or something that somebody found while combing through your timeline. 7/

Lots of people are QTing you, inviting more people in for the event. You begin to lose your sense of the seriousness of your original transgression or if that’s even what’s being discussed anymore. 8/

You get needled and needled and needled until you lash out at somebody. This is screenshot and RTed at proof that you’re an unrepentant asshole. This brings in more people and convincing those already involved that they’re justified in their group anger. 9/

Blocking people is proof that you’re unrepentant. How dare you block X?! That’s so disrespectful!

Anyway, it eventually dies down, but you still get stragglers for the next few days. People who just found the incident and want their turn. 10/

If you engage, you run the risk of starting everything up again.

Regardless, the whole incident is bookmarked to be brought up the next time you make another mistake.

It’s an incredibly fun feature of this website. Two thumbs way up! 11/11

Full disclosure: I’ve been on both ends of these things. It’s not immediately apparent that you’re engaging in them. Often, you have the absolute best of intentions—you’re standing up for something you believe.

I’m trying—*trying*—to monitor myself and my Twitter interactions to not be involved in them. But it’s not always easy. You see people you like and respect going after someone, and you think “Worthy cause. I’m gonna help out.”