I self diagnosed as autistic last month and have received three distinct reactions from telling people.
1. Excited encouragement
2. Confused acceptance
3. Angry disagreement
1. Excited encouragement
2. Confused acceptance
3. Angry disagreement
I actually thought of doing it years ago, but got angry disagreement from the one person I told.
So I put it away.
So I put it away.
I knew something was up my entire life. I felt different. I acted different.
My mom thought I was autistic but it was the 80s and I was a girl so she did what she could and taught me social rules and how to mask.
My mom thought I was autistic but it was the 80s and I was a girl so she did what she could and taught me social rules and how to mask.
And so I was just an awkward nerd.
Only in the past fee years as I have gotten comfortable, got good friends, worked through things, have I thought to revisit the idea.
And damnit, it is so wonderful to be about to shout "You did that too?" Or "There is a word for that?!?!"
I read and think and discuss and repeat.
And damnit, it feels right.
And damnit, it feels right.
Especially when I try fidgets and my hands just do their own thing.
My fingers know what they like.
And it feels like home.
My fingers know what they like.
And it feels like home.