thread of things the 6 y/o i tutor says:

“are you a girl or a boy? a girl? oh. because you look like a boy.” lowkey kinda honored by this. appearing less feminine i think that is good.

“easy peezy, lemon my squeezy, i say!”

oh yeah forgot to add: i leave between 3:30-4 and he was like “can you PLEASEEE stay til 4?” so i said sure and then when his mom came downstairs he shouted “SHES STAYING TIL 4. I MADE HER.” and his mom was like

he asked what math i do at school and i said calculus and he goes “is it hard?” and i said yes it’s really big math and numbers and he goes “LIKE 130 PLUS 100?? OH GOD”

“i bet you come over to my house and want to do my homework.” yes sir please

their dog was barking so i said “whoa take a chill pill!” and the kid BURSTED OUT LAUGHING and shouted “I DONT THINK DOGS CANT TAKE CHILL PILLS HAHAHA”

he also said he wishes i was his mom so i could come over everyday no fuckin way

and THENNN when i was leaving i was like ok i’ll see you next week and he REFUSED TO GO INSIDE. he said i wasn’t the boss of him and he can do what he wants and i was like bro ur 6. please go inside. and he WOULDNTTTT

i’m literally peeing to take a break and he won’t leave me alonedjdkdkdj

he only sings two songs and they are o canada and old town toad

last week we were play fighting as iron man and the hulk and i accidentally hit his hand so the skin tore and today he goes “look my knuckles are all better from where you hit me and made me bleed” like. the guilt trip

also when that happened his older brother came home and right away he was like “look!! olivia hurt me :D” all excited i was like KSJSKSJKS IT WAS AN ACCIDENT PLS DONT SHOW IT OFF

every time i mention anything i like he goes “i don’t care.”

he said he doesn’t like play do and i was like awww i love play do and he immediately goes “i don’t care.”

he’s learning to write his numbers the correct way and he was like “is this 6 right?” and i said yes and he mumbles “if you lie to me i’ll kick you out” you don’t have the authority you are 6

he’s being so mean to me omg this is always my problem with kids is that they don’t see me as an authority and i’m afraid of implementing that i am hhhhh

the only way i was able to show i was an authority with the family i nannied is saying no to random things so that i don’t seem like a pushover which is. not the best tactic but no harm was done

i said i was basically an old lady and he said “no you’re 18!! maybe in 5 MONTHS you’ll be old...”

we played soccer for like 15 min im so fucking sweaty i can’t function it’s so hot im going to die

i was also obv going easy on him cuz that’s how 6 y/o are and he was like no. play your absolute hardest. and i played club soccer for 7 years so i was like uhhh... no...but he made me and i annihilated him i am a bad person

HES SO CUTEJDJSKSJ they’re playing a math game and they can play against a partner or by themselves and he unmuted himself to tell the whole class “i have a partner!! she’s over there!!! :D” IMNIN SHAMBLES

he kicked the soccer ball and it got stuck between my legs and he LOST HIS SHIT and yelled “HAHAHA IT HIT YOUR PENIS” fucking PARDON???

he said i should come over every single day instead of just two days a week and i was like sorry buddy ive got class :( and he’s like “I DONT CARE ILL DO IT FOR YOU!!” god i wish

he just got out of a breakout room and let out a huge sigh and said “oh my god that was SO much drama”

we don’t know what to play and i’m in the bathroom and he just shouted through the door “THINK OF IDEAS WHILE YOURE ON THE TOILET OK?”

he told me a man was coming at 4 to look at their back deck and that’s when i leave so i was like “aw he’s coming to replace me :(“ and he was like NO?! HES LOOKING AT OUR DECK WHY WOULD HE REPLACE YOU like he yelled at me oh my godksksm

i love listening into class the teacher asked if the kids would want to travel to outer space and their reasons are INSANEEE

“i want to go because my brother couldn’t bother me there but also there’s no wifi i would come home and there would be wifi but my brother isn’t there which is why i would go”

“i wouldn’t because you could get OVERHEATED in the suit and DIE?? but you might get some cool moon stones”

he won’t stop calling himself “The Toaster.” it’s been weeks. every time he beats me in a game he goes “ARGHHHH THE TOASTER HAS TOASTED ONCE AGAINNNNN” and i don’t get a chance to react

their qotd for breakout rooms is if they could travel ANYWHERE where would they go and he waited 15 min to say his and when he finally went he immediately said “pool party.” and the other kids were like what? and he goes “i said. pool party.”

he had to make his own shape and count how many sides there are and he just drew one long line and i was like...what shape is that and he went “umm...? astronaut.”

today he admitted to me he really only does know 3 songs. they’re, once again, old town road and o canada, but the third one is also the star spangled banner. he only knows these songs.

i lee beating him in uno and he keeps crying idk what to do

also when his mom said she pays me $96 a week he was like “you should get $70 for 12 days $96 is too much” im glad u do not dictate my paycheck

i haven’t seen him in 2 weeks since he started going back to school but i went back today and his mom said he was counting down the days until he saw me and he was so excited this morning omfg

also we were playing would you rather and one of the questions was about being the president and he said “by the way donald trump? i hate him you have NO idea how much i hate that guy. anyway”