Ahmed and I (long before we were married or engaged) had a ritual. Our office - we worked together at the time - was close to Sheraton. So every night, after putting the pages to bed - usually 1-2 a.m - we'd go to Sheraton and have coffee there together, unwind, then head home. https://twitter.com/hijakamran/status/1300761609455972356

By the time we'd get to Sheraton, the poolside café would pretty much be empty. It was nice.

This was long before Uber or Careem; I had a trusted cabbie whom I'd call to drop me off home. I've always disliked being dropped home or anywhere by boyfriends.

So, we'd go to Sheraton

in Ahmed's car. We were basically regulars in the café there by now.

This one time, there was no valet service for some reason that I don't remember; so I went inside to get us a table and place our orders while Ahmed parked the car.

I got our table, placed our orders, lit a

ciggie.

All of a sudden, this really weird man stumbled over to my table, and asked if he could sit there. I said, "No, this chair is taken." He insisted. I repeated my response. He tried to forcibly sit. I stood up and yelled at him to get the fuck away from me and my table.

The waiters all heard me, they saw what was going on, they did nothing. The man only moved after I threatened to thwack him across the face with my very heavy handbag (I used to lug a lot of shit around in it, including a laptop; atleast 2 books; 2 changes of clothes, a

toothbrush, etc, in case shit got messed up in the city and I couldn't go home; a firstaid kit; etc.) It was a visibly heavy bag.

A few minutes later, Ahmed finally came inside. I told him what had happened. By this time the fucker who had been harassing me had disappeared.

Ahmed went to the waiters to say wtf. The waiters said, and I quote: "Sir, voh humaarey regular customer haiN. Aap aur ma'am bhi rozaana aatey haiN. Hum sumjhey aaj aap nahi aaengey aur ma'am kisi aur ka wait ker rahee hongi." They said that they assumed that I was an escort.

We

complained to the management. Shit-all happened. We never went back there.

Essentially, 2 people would come for coffee after work: a man (AY) a woman (me.) They assumed that only the woman must be an escort, and that it was fair game for an alleged escort to be harassed by one

of their male customers.

Men are trash all around.

I was 25 when this happened. It was 2010. Now, I don't threaten assholes; I tase them without warning.

Wait, no, I was 26. Had a "senior moment" with math, sorry

Also, "putting the pages to bed" = finishing up work / end of work day.