FPL STATS OF SHITHOUSERY

The xG/A FILES

What players caressed this whimsical stat last season? We dive into some heroes and villains as we look at that all important data and ask... does it mean... anything?

Let's find the fuck out with a {FILAMENT}

POST RESTART xG

Antonio 7.92
Sterling 5.75
Jesus 5.64
Vardy 5.39
Kane 5.32
Giroud 5.18
Ings 4.91
Salah 4.72
Auba 4.34
Rashford 4.25

Antonio's "better than Messi" xG has already been spoken about. Those fixtures should not put you off. If you want him. Buy him.

Other highlights show that the case for Kane and Vardy, both with fixtures on their side, remains strong.

Rashford as we will see later, was perhaps the most unlucky asset in the game not to haul post restart.

Giroud is clearly not an option. Just look at Google images instead

POST RESTART xG II

Grealish 0.99

A barely polished turd for much of the final hurdle. Jack's form fell off a cliff and he exuded the threat of a single midge up against Nessie.

Saint-Max 0.93

I'll just leave that one here...

Moura 0.53

Quite simply not an FPL option barring multiple injuries. We'll always have that hat trick Luca. You fraud.

Pepe 0.26

That is worse than Luke Shaw.

Luke Shaw people!

Mings 0.10

5m buys you a Villa defender with the goal threat of Harry Redknapp's mother.

POST RESTART xA

Kdb 3.79
Bowen 2.52
Willian 2.14
Hourihane 2.07
Rashford 1.96
Salah 1.80
Mahrez 1.75
Sarr 1.67
Bruno 1.67
Antonio 1.52

Yes yes KDB. Salah and Antonio weapons in every sense. Rashford is the anti Greenwood here. All the xG/A... none of the points.

But hold on... Bowen you little legend what is this? You creative temptress you. Could we all be missing this pocket rocket in our teams for 6.5m?

Oh wait just seen Hourihane.

For fucks sake xA. Everytime man. Everytime.

POST RESTART xA II

Barnes (Harvey) 0.43

And you wonder why the train didn't fucking leave the station son? You're an embarrassment.

Trossard 0.39

Oooh dear Leo. And I Iiked you. Loved you even. But now? You're on the scrapheap lad. Such is the power of xA over any other data.

Gundo 0.23

If he had played false 9 like WE WERE PROMISED it would be higher

Calvert-Lewin 0.14

I love xA. Never doubted it. The system works.

People still have this guy in their team you know? It's getting increasingly harder not to laugh. And frankly point.

So let's look a little longer now over the whole of last season and pull out a few winners and losers.

The top players for xG ALL SEASON are

Vardy
Rashford
Salah
Sterling

All with scores over 19. Vardy overperformed. Rashford underperformed. The other two hit their scores.

The Biggest under-performers were

(Goals to xG)

Jesus 14 v 18
Firmino 9 v 14
Maupay 10 v 14
Jota 7 v 12
McGoldrick 2 v 8

Conclusion? These players are either unlucky... or shite.

They're shite.

And finally let's look again at xA

The top players here were

KDB
Trent
Mahrez
Salah
McNeil
Willian

Yup. Trent is a defender and is second in the entire game. And people are thinking of owning Egan and Ozil over him?

Man alive.

So what does all this tell us? After all most top scorers way over achieved their xA/xG. Kdb for example got 39 returns from a combined xFile score of 22.

Mane got 28 from 19.

Bruno 16 from 8.

Joelinton 4 from 6.

Fuck me is there any stat that can make that guy look good?

I'm not here to tell you what to do. I'm here to present the data and take the piss. See anything you like from this... dive in.

If you really believe Man Utd are a less creative side with Bruno in it? Dive out.

Happy Hunting. You have been charged £5 for reading this thread.