"When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid." -Audre Lorde

Today I am 23 years old and I’m holding these words by Prophetess Audre Lorde near and dear to my heart.

What does it mean to use my strength in the service of my vision when as a Black woman I am expected to use my strength in the service of others always before serving myself?

This is a thought that has rolled around in my mind for a while since reading this quote.

Using my strength isn’t always showing up and standing up for each and every battle. I’ve learned over the course of 2020 that being strong is also about being still and taking rest.

I was talking to @FindinqNeema about this concept. Striking that balance of sitting in feelings of grief and pain but not totally leaning into feelings of despair is essential. We don’t always have to be on go. There is power in not being productive all the damn time.

For me, I was terrified of stopping because then I’d really have to acknowledge feelings that I’ve suppressed. NOW THIS is the part of Audre Lorde’s quote that challenges me.

When you start working on yourself, it is debilitating and scary as hell. BUT you are cultivating YOUR vision. This is powerful because so many people have a vision for my life and I take their perceptions on before navigating what I want for MYSELF!

And I’ve received pushback for this. @Miah_Briana has received flack for this. It has been a vicious cycle of taking on other people’s feelings and internalizing them as your own. So much so that you lose sight of your true feelings.

When you work on your vision you constantly reintroduce yourself to yourself. It comes to a point when you don’t tolerate any and everybody telling you how your life is gonna be. You become less afraid of people’s projections.

"When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid."

Imma end this thread by plugging Audre Lorde’s memoir, and shouting out @yungislandpimp for my favorite birthday gift so far: