SHORT AU: How would you feel?
(Kim Nam Joon X Y/N)

(1)

Dear Joon,

I never thought that I would be in a situation where I have to write the things I want to say to you.

We were so open to each other. I used to tell you every little things I do and every detail of my day.
(2)
I like the way how you listen even if it was so petty. Weather its about the color of my nails, the wrong size of my shirt and/or how i tripped over the staircase for the nth time, You listen to them.

But my favorite part every time we talk is when you tell me about your day
(3)
I love your stories because it shows your passion.

I love hearing your fan meeting stories, Your eyes sparkle every time you talk about your fans.

I love hearing your fights and quarrels with the members because it shows how much you care for them.
(4)
I love hearing your work rants because It shows how much love you have for music.

I love it when you babble lyrics every now and then. It is amazing to witness how amazing you are as an artist.

I love hearing your frustration over breaking your toy collections.
(5)
I love the fact that you always have time to share your stories with me despite of being drained from the concert.

I love how the way your voice change whenever you get excited over small things.

I love it whenever you talk to yourself every time you get too excited.
(6)

Most specially, I love it when you just simply don& #39;t want to talk but still allow me to be at your side.

It seems that I know every detail about you. I guess being together since we were using diapers up until now that we are both professional really pays off.
(7)
It is amazing to have you as my best friend. We were both each other& #39;s comfort. You were there when I couldn& #39;t pass my major subject exam.

You helped me with my academic problem despite of you facing too much criticism because of your lyrics.
(8)
I was there when you have to go under surgery because of your sleeping/breathing problems while at the same time you have to deal with people accusing you for changing your face features.

During that time, I was loosing everything at work and you picked me up.
(9)
You gave me the chance to open the doors in the same industry you were in. Being behind the camera is hard but you showed me what I can do.

I met a lot of people and learned a lot of things because of you.

But I never knew that loving you as a & #39;man& #39; would be one of them.
(10)
Both you and I knew that you have a special place in my life. But I never thought that you would invade my whole heart, mind and soul.

You were an amazing person and no one can blame me for having these kind of feelings towards you.
(11)
I knew that I am sacrificing our 25 years of friendship while writing this letter but during our trip together, The fear covers my heart and mind.

The fear of having this hidden feelings for 10 years plus the bond and connection we share scares me.
(12)
I was there since the beginning. We both cover up for each other every time that you have to go to the city for your under ground battle which your parent aren& #39;t aware of.

And now that you have everything we dream of I can& #39;t be selfish to take these things away from you.
(13)
As your best friend, I know every detail about you and most of the time, I can even hear your unsaid thoughts. I am not deaf nor blind not to notice the things between us

And now that I am starting to want you and me to release our suppressed feelings we have to each other
(14)
I can& #39;t help but to take a step back and listen to what my mind is telling me to do.

I have to ignore the fact that I& #39;m falling deeply in love with the man who& #39;s always been there. My first friend and my only best friend.

I have to leave and let you go.
(15) LAST

But I still wonder, How would you feel if I told you that I love you?

Maybe some other time, We will know about your feelings.

But I guess, Not today,

(PLEASE WATCH THE VIDEO NEXT)
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