tw // selfharm , mention of weight gain and loss

hey ,, i rlly hope this tweet gets to at least someone but these few days i've just been feeling kinda.. off? im not really sad but im not happy at the same time ? -

-and like everyday i feel insecure, like im either too fat or too skinny or my body just feels and looks weird. everyday i either force myself and tell myself to lose weight or gain weight, and like it just frustrates me because some days i feel like im too fat and other days-

i feel too skinny. one of my irls who i was rlly close to started selfharming and she made a new acc and joined s//lfh/rmtwt using her number, i used my number to make my priv acc and it showed up in my notifs that my contact joined twt and i was curious so i 'stalked' the acc ??

i saw the s//htwt tag and i didn't know what it is so i clicked on it and well,, saw lots and lots of pictures of c*ts and they just brought me back really bad memories. i used to sh when i was slightly younger ( around like 11 ? ) and i stopped cause it was becoming a trend-

and since these few days i've been feeling bad those picture just made me feel like starting again but at the same time i really really dont want to, i hope at least someone understands but what im trying to say here is, im asking for attention, i know it sounds bad and it-

probably is, but im asking for attention, i want maybe just even at least one person to tell me that everything is gonna be fine, that im okay just the way i am and maybe just maybe it'll make me feel better, please all im asking for is just these few words. if you see this-

and dont like what i've said in this thread plspls just kindly block me ? i've just had enough at this point honestly i dont mind if i get cancelled or smth from this

im sorry if you read all of this its so long