If it was the year 1680 in England, most dudes in this corner of Twitter would end up as Pirates

Would u rather

1. Get treated like dirt under the Royal Navy with little room for advancement because you're a commoner

2. Raid Spanish ships for gold as a free man w the boyz

You'd have the

1. Playboy Pirates having a kid on every island from Trinidad to Cuba

2. The copper counting nerds (crypto dudes) who want to invest their loot into wool in England stead of enjoying life

3. The esoteric pirates experimenting with Indian brews & Aztec amulets

4. Grifter pirates who spend their time on a Bahamian beach melting down and carving green rum bottle pieces into fake emeralds & selling them.

5. Intellectual pirates mapping out the entire geography of the Leeward Islands including their flora & fauna

6. Complainer pirates who bitch about how these hoes in Tortuga aint loyal with no virtue left and can be bought off with a 3 pints of ale and 2 pieces-of-eight.

7. Christian pirates who carve out the heart of a Dutch Capitain on Saturday, then repent in Church on Sunday.