Will I be joining the 18.7% owning the #FPL 7th most popular midfielder overall and going for Allan Saint-Maximin as my budget choice?

FUCK NO!!!!

I’m going with Stuart Armstrong, who’s not even in the top 30 most owned mids.

Here’s why you should too…

1/10

His name is spelled Stuart, not Stewart.

As in House of Stuart. King James VI of Scotland also became King James of I of England in 1603, which led to the UK being formed.

So he’s basically fucking Royalty!

2/10

Whereas Allan is clearly an inferior spelling to the far more suave, sophisticated, witty and good looking Alan.

Don’t believe me? Just ask @FPL_Partridge!

3/10

Armstrong is from Inverness, so a tough Highlander.

Bye bye yellow/red flags – no injuries for the last two seasons.

ASM is from a Paris commune i.e. a Hippie!

He missed 11 games through injury last season alone and even needed a “rest” one week, the wimp!

4/10

Armstrong 19/20 – 5 goals, 4 assists, 10 BP’s in 1706 mins.

ASM 19/20 – 3 goals, 5 assists (4 of them vs Bournemouth so possibly shouldn’t count!), 7 BPS’s in 1860 mins.

His stats are better and he got more points than ASM last season.

What’s not to like?

5/10

1195 of his 1706 mins came in the second half of the season.

Southampton were top 6 for the 2nd half-season.

Which is when Armstrong became a nailed-on starter.

Can you see a pattern emerging?

Hasenhüttl just loves him as a part of his improving, attacking side.

6/10

Meantime poor ASM plays for Newcastle.

His creative stats are better than Armstrong’s but with Gayle injured who will put away the chances he creates?

Joelinton with his 30% shot accuracy & 2 goals in 2678 mins?

Hardly!

Which leaves Andy Carroll.

*leaves quietly*

7/10

More persuasion needed?

Watching games with Armstrong in your FPL team will be exciting as he basically shoots on sight.

He scored >20 goals in the 2 seasons before Soton.

That’s more than ASM has scored in his entire career.

Now he’s nailed on, expect many more goals!

8/10

He shares his birthday with Van Gogh & Tracy Chapman, making him both a great artist and cool as fuck by birthright.

ASM shares his with Mitt Romney and a load of Tik-Tok and Instagram “stars”

That’s right, a Republican Senator is as good as it gets for ASM.

9/10

Last season vs opening 6 opponents:

ASM - 9 appearances, no goals or assists

Armstrong – 8 appearances, 1 goal, 1 assist…which was only against 5 opponents as he plays WBA in GW4!

That should be all the convincing needed – you know what to do…

10/10

Hope you enjoyed my first ever thread.

For more FPL fun too wordy for twitter, have a look at my “Secret Diary of an FPL addict” blog: https://fplsocialist.wordpress.com/2020/08/23/the-secret-diary-of-an-fpl-addict-part-ii/