CW/ suicide

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Suicidal ideation is a ringing in my ear that gets really low... very faint.... enough for me to carry on and be ok. But, it never goes away.

It has been very loud this month. I am okay. I’m far enough in my journey to admit when i hear it and be ok.

But, i am thinking about everyone else whose experiencing this and does not know how to cope and/or have a support system.

It is truly a terrible time to be a survivor.

It’s just the hyper awareness of mortality these days that’s not helping lol

But i am okay. I want people to know/see that you can have these feelings and that they will pass. When i feel like this, i change my routine in radical ways to meet my most immediate emotional needs.

The ringing will be louder though. I find relief in that honesty with myself. I cannot perform happiness for the comfort of others.