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So I got talking to this lady I visit every now and then when I feel my chest is heavy and stuff in general, she is separated from her husband, but an all round wholesome person. Here is what she had to say about relationships entry:
She said that when she met her husband, it was sparks all over, like âdriver ya marato bula letsikangope moya o tseneâ type of love. She had me grinning because I am a sucker for a good and true love story, even when it has nothing to do with me.
She said the first red flag she ignored was when her husband insisted they get land near his parentsâ house (her in-laws). I saw nothing wrong here because a wife leaves her family to form part of her husbandâs family moes? Well I was wrong.
She explained that sure, it is well to live in your husbandâs home, but he has to move out and take you (wife) with, and it should not be anywhere near his parentsâ house or yours (wife) because when there is smoke, you have no choice but to sit there and fix stuff
In addition to that, you do not have bias family causing unnecessary noise, bringing more trouble than necessary in the marriage. She also said all mothers in law will always protect their sons when it comes down to the wire, no matter how good. Valid point here.
2nd red flag came when they bought land to start building, and the husband insisted that it be registered under her name because that absolved him from any responsibility. He has nothing to fight for should things go sour.
So, imagine if they had gotten land next to his parents, in his name, or parentsâ name, and there came a rough patch? She would have no ground to stand on or much to fight for? Sheâd have to pack and go back home. (Well tradition complicates this part but yeah).
Because men always act within script old as time, the husband started seeing people on the side and eventually stopped coming home. She called a family meeting, and well, gent insisted that he did not own anything in that yard so he cannot be seen as the man of the house.
Bruh!? Men menating.
Lessons after the whole story? If you are going to build something solid and long term with the love of your life, commitment should be given ground to thrive and manifest and show itself, by sharing the little things that eventually birth bigger things.
Lessons after the whole story? If you are going to build something solid and long term with the love of your life, commitment should be given ground to thrive and manifest and show itself, by sharing the little things that eventually birth bigger things.
...and men always show you that they are not ready to commit by making everything about themselves or by giving you all the responsibilities. The kids will be your sole responsibility as well.
