Read on Twitter
any sentence with 
after is automatically funny
after is automatically funny
tell your mum i said thanks for having me
your pet dog is so cute
my uncle lives in brighton
chickens can float
my favourite food is italian
children are annoying
i miss my maths teacher
my favourite subject was english
i miss my friends
can’t wait for halloween
the lorax is a good film
i haven’t seen my cousins in ages
cows have udders
fish can’t drown
my nan doesn’t speak english
crack cocaine is bad for you
over 80% of the ocean is unexplored
morgz emotionally abuses his mum for cpm
murder is illegal
cleopatra shagged most of her family members
the shouty man from horrible histories will forever be in my head rent free
aliens are probably real
humans main purpose is to reproduce
sequinned clothing is uncomfortable to wear
don’t talk to strangers
stay in school
i used to find miranda sings funny
your dad is such a good host tell him i said thanks for dinner it was amazing
shane dawson shags cats
my uncle has been missing for 5 years
