thread of me venting. tw emotions that are overwhelming
i think that im crashing again. i think after feeling so high in adrenaline and reckless moves i flopped. i was happy for like a month, and it all just sort of left, and i felt grateful and guaranteed.

i realized that i don’t have a balance with my emotions. one minute im laughing so hard my chest is closing up and the next im breathing for air while i panic, of everything. everything is overwhelming on social media. the gate keeping, mental illness, picking up symptoms and+

more. diagnosis is a privilege. i feel uncomfortable saying im depressed because i don’t have depression. err well diagnosed. you know ive always been sort of scatter brained when i vent. i go everywhere. i say everything on my mind and over share sometimes.

balance seems something so far. if it’s just on repeat. and your sensitive to all, those laughs or those fake people. you can’t ... be balanced. and you might fall by yourself. independence is so hard. im trying my worst . im mad with myself for wanting to feel sad. it’s stupid.

wanting to feel sad, is so shitty. i never thought id want to be sad. i don’t wanna feel high up and fall again, do it all over again and i just. i just um not liking this. education, and working everything out seems like the best method.?.?.

i don’t know what’s coming next. i don’t know if something new will come. i don’t know if something will break. i shouldn’t stress. i should do what i enjoy, and break that need of being sad. i learned a lot about myself in this thread .[done]-

im just gonna pin this cus this is my most recent tweet that uh i made