not a single drop of alcohol nor thc in my blood for two months now since my spiritual shroom trip. learned so much on that journey. side effects of seeing truth is u also feel pain. i had ptsd, anxiety and panic attacks w paramedics not knowing wth was happening to me.

all of that after the trip. took an appointment with my doctor and he prescribe me some medication which i didn't take yet and don't plan to neither i'll explain why i came to that conclusion. actually pretty easy conclusion

did some shadow work and tried to understand the reason for those reactions even after my trip. in which i felt death. literally. i didn't experience the whole thing, pretty sure i will when i'll do my ayahuasca trip in peru or wtv later in my life. anyways

shadow work and some talking w my spiritual guides, which are within me, in the shower. came to the conclusion that to see it all is to accept the balance. Good/Bad, Black/White, Positive/Negative. to also feel it. sadly i wasn't prepare for that. explaining the high levels of

anxiety. i now know that i must work even more on myself if i want to enjoy the forbidden fruit. i also confirmed a long time thought/dream which is for me (my soul) to make a difference on this planet and to affect and interact w other souls to come to the ultimate realization

:collective consciousness. where is everything there's nothing. therefore i am now working on accepting the better version of myself which already exists somewhere because time is illusion. just have to embodied the self u choose. I am not scared of time anymore

my ego David, is scared of it tho. normal and basic. he is my defence in this human realm but he is not me. so sometimes i have to bring him back in any way i can like rn tbh.

anyways all that to say. work on becoming a better person to change the world does sound corny af dont get me wrong. but wth is corny anyways. human experience comes w a different lesson for each of us. at the end of the day we're all one and the same collective energy

it's great to see that this thread won't have any views or interactions until i decide im embodying the self that has now come change the world and the people in it. and so to my future readers my past self salutes u. u are all great and capable u just have to accept it.