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she stood out to me before I even met her. I remember being 10 and watching the dvd of my first recital at my new studio, and there was this beautiful lyrical number wear a girl did this switch leap...I replayed it a lot because I was amazed. she& #39;s always been gorgeous +
fastforward to us actually being in class together the next year. I wanted to befriend a lot of kids that year but I only succeeded with her; we would eat together on our break and she would always get subway. I still remember her order +
we danced together for at least 6 years and graduated the same year... she was funny, smart, and so pretty. dedicated, athletic (thighs 
https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🔥" title="Feuer" aria-label="Emoji: Feuer">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😔" title="Nachdenkliches Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Nachdenkliches Gesicht">), focused. i just always was drawn to her and wanted to be her closest friend, all the time +
there was another girl in our class who was way more extroverted than me. I was always jealous about how she could go up and just talk with her, hug her, and make her laugh, still am a little tbh lol +
ahh this girl tho. she hated anime (smh) and I made a whole 4 min amv with a song she loved because I wanted to connect with her. our birthdays are a week apart, and I made her a drawing for one of them, I think I made her jewelry too +
i was just so awkward but I liked her so much and wanted to be around her all the time. I always loved when we did partner work and I could lift her, or when we went across the floor together or rehearsed choreo +
graduation was hard. I was forced to realize that a majority of relationships are just based on proximity and convenience, and she was kind of one of them. I tried to connect with her that summer but she was busy working and bad at texting, but ig that meant she didn& #39;t care +
that was four years ago... one morning in september I bwoke up and was just kind of distraught over our relationship. I wrote a whole poem about my complicated feelings about her that is tbh one of my favorites +
I wrote a poem in the winter when I saw someone who looked like her. I wrote a poem after seeing her for the first time in months, when she came home from spring break and surprised us in class. I published the first poem in my comm college& #39;s lit/poetry journal +
if I write a lot of poetry lol... that& #39;s how you know I& #39;m emotionally invested in you. for her, the theme of my poetry was always & #39;yearning.& #39; +
we got froyo to catch up and she told me of her adventures with boys... she was involved in ballroom dance and she showed me photos and videos. i think i was jealous that she got to dance with guys, but also always a little jealous of the guys she danced with +
i& #39;ve only seen her really each once year since then for recital, and we wish each other hbd on our birthdays, which are exactly a week apart. she& #39;s catholic lmao. I& #39;m not sure if we honestly would have worked, probs not but.. +
I just miss her. and I know I felt for her more than I& #39;ve felt for a friend, but she didn& #39;t give me really even that sometimes. she got her ma recently in a 4 year program and I remember her questioning with me if she even wanted to do that work anymore... +
i really hope she& #39;s happy. Maybe I should reach out? idk i just... write a lot of emotional poetry. tldr; kate writes poetry about beautiful girls and generally is sad and lonely about it lmao, ty for reading https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="💜" title="Violettes Herz" aria-label="Emoji: Violettes Herz">
