Ark is now a game where I log in intent to finish building my greenhouse gazebo and end up with five new raptor buddies for my raptor gang.

Today while I was waiting for my raptor buddies to get hungry during the taming process, I busied myself by taming three dodos that were wandering around by me.

All you need to do to tame a dodo is punch it a few times and force feed it berries while it’s unconscious. Because that’s how this game goes.

Dodos are also extremely weak and will die to one hit from pretty much anything in the environment. They do not make good pets. They are also dumb. There's a reason they are extinct.

But after you tame a creature you can do a lot of fun things with their AI behaviours.

Like set a creature to "aggressive" and it will fight the nearest wild dinosaur near it.

There's also a dinosaur in the game called a diplodocus. It's smaller than a brontosaurus, but still very bronto-like. The important thing about a diplo, though, is that when it attacks it deals no damage. It just knocks you back quite far.

This obviously led to an experiment of how long it takes three dodos to kill a diplo.

No one knows, because dodos are idiots. They got stuck on rocks while the diplo fled for its life, then they decided the closest dinosaur for them to attack was a Therizinosaur. All you need to know about the Therizinosaur is that we call them "giant murder birds".