Thread by @wanlangjis, can we please take a moment to imagine the hilarity of wangxian [...]

can we please take a moment to imagine the hilarity of wangxian going on the newlywed game show and either a) completely annihilating their opponents or b) disagreeing a lot more than one would expect

host: wei ying, we asked lan zhan over here what part of your body he likes the most. what do you think h-

wwx: definitely my ass.

host: ...that& #39;s correct

lwj: *holds out his hand proudly for a high five*

host: lan zhan, we asked wei ying here what your favorite activity to do together is. what did he say?

lwj: that is simple. wei ying and i love to garden together.

wwx: *flips over his answer and it says & #39;bed stuff ;)& #39;*

lwj: Why Would You Say This On National Television

host: wei ying, we asked lan zhan to rate your cooking on a scale of 1 to 10. what did he give you?

wwx: omg obviously a 10!

lwj: ....

wwx: why aren& #39;t you saying anything lan zhan

lwj: ...

wwx: lan zhan flip your answer around

lwj: no

wwx: lan zhan.

host: lan zhan, we asked wei ying: who fell in love with who first?

lwj: wei ying fell in love with me first

wwx: omg lan zhan!! that& #39;s exactly what i put

https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🥺" title="Pleading face" aria-label="Emoji: Pleading face">

lwj: i would like to elaborate that i don& #39;t actually believe this. i just knew that would be your answer.

wwx: ...

host: wei ying, whats the thing lan zhan loves most about you?

wwx: oh, he tells me this all the time. he loves my smile, my laugh, my creativity, how adventurous i am-

host: we said one thing... you just made this a lot harder for him

host to lan zhan: we asked wei ying what you love most about him. what did he say?

lan zhan: It is impossible to list one thing. I love his smile, his laugh, his creativity, how adventurous he is-

host: wtf

host to wei ying: we asked lan zhan, what do you do that drives him crazy?

wwx: oh! haha, well... nibble on his ears i guess

host: ...

lwj: ...i said you eat with your mouth open sometimes

wwx: i see i grossly misunderstood the question.

host to wei ying: we asked lan zhan, which of you two is the most organized?

wwx: omg this is a hard one!

lwj: no it isn& #39;t.

host to wei ying: we asked lan zhan to name your least attractive quality. his answer wasn& #39;t exactly valid, but...

wwx: *sighs* let me guess. he said, "Everything about Wei Ying is attractive."

lwj: and ill say it again.

host to lan zhan: we asked Wei Ying to tell us which of his family members you get along best with

lwj: Jiang Yanli

wwx: *grins mischievously* I said Jiang Cheng

lwj: .....I do not believe you actually said that.

wwx: see for yourself pretty boy

https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😘" title="Kusshand zuwerfendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Kusshand zuwerfendes Gesicht"> *hands him paper*

lwj:

host to lan zhan: we asked Wei Ying to tell us which of his family members you get along best withlwj: Jiang Yanli wwx: *grins mischievously* I said Jiang Cheng lwj: .....I do not believe you actually said that.wwx: see for yourself pretty boy https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable=

*hands him paper*lwj:" title="host to lan zhan: we asked Wei Ying to tell us which of his family members you get along best withlwj: Jiang Yanli wwx: *grins mischievously* I said Jiang Cheng lwj: .....I do not believe you actually said that.wwx: see for yourself pretty boy https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😘" title="Kusshand zuwerfendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Kusshand zuwerfendes Gesicht"> *hands him paper*lwj:" class="img-responsive" style="max-width:100%;"/>

host to Wei Ying: same question as the last round. which of lan zhan’s family members do you get along best with?

wwx: lan huan!

lwj: the answer I chose was uncle.

wwx: ...

lwj: pretty boy.

host to lan zhan: we asked Wei Ying to remember what song was played during the first dance at your wedding. What did he say?

lwj: wangxian

wwx: *clears throat*

lwj: *sigh* dot mp3

if any of you have one please don’t be shy to tweet it, I’m sure you’re all more creative than I am

https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">

i accidentally continued this thread under the wrong tweet so excuse the double posting of the next couple tweets

https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="👀" title="Augen" aria-label="Emoji: Augen">

host to lan zhan: while wei ying is backstage we& #39;ll ask you, from 1 to 10, how attractive does he look right when he wakes up?

lwj: 20.5

host: uh. *laughs* well with an answer like that we certainly know who& #39;s sleeping on the couch tonight for costing them the game!

host to wei ying: we asked lan zhan how attractive he thinks you are right after you& #39;ve woken up in the morning

wwx: 20.5, probably

host: .......

host to lan zhan as wei ying is backstage: complete the following sentence: "the next time my husband leaves his [blank] on the [blank], im tossing it out the window"

lwj: his clothes on his body

host: this is a family show

host to wei ying: we asked lan zhan, if you two had a child, who would be the strict parent?

wwx: we actually have a little a-yuan so this question is easy haha. it& #39;s lan zhan.

lwj: i put it was you.

wwx: ...

lwj: you wouldnt buy him the toy he wanted

wwx: say sike right now

host: wei ying, where& #39;s the most public place you guys have ever & #39;done it& #39;?

wwx: oh. lan zhan& #39;s uncle owns this library, so... i wont say more because i know he& #39;s watching.

lwj: *slowly turns board around, which says & #39;im sorry uncle& #39; on it*

host: lan zhan, we asked wei ying to guess what you would choose to save in the case of a fire: your phone, your computer, or your wallet?

lwj: wei ying.

host: that& #39;s not one of the options.

lwj: then this is a flawed question.

wwx: i told you he& #39;d say that.

host: wei ying, we asked lan zhan - who is the better kisser?

wwx: lan zhan

lwj: it& #39;s wei ying

wwx: no

lwj: yes

host: ok let& #39;s move o-

wwx: maybe we should... kiss right now to find out

host: no

lwj: ...i think that would be the best way to settle this

host: NO

host: the next question for our couples is "when& #39;s the last time your significant other wasnt in & #39;the mood& #39;?" lan zhan, you& #39;ll be sitting out this round

lwj: why

host: wei ying started laughing as soon as i asked the question and would not stop long enough to give me an answer

host: lan zhan, we asked wei ying to name the best gift you& #39;ve ever given him. what did he say?

lwj: my heart.

wwx: lan zhan

https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🥺" title="Pleading face" aria-label="Emoji: Pleading face">

https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="💕" title="Zwei Herzen" aria-label="Emoji: Zwei Herzen">

also wwx: *discreetly yet furiously starts erasing & #39;big ass bottle of emperor& #39;s smile& #39; off his board*

host while wwx is backstage: lan zhan, who proposed to who?

lwj: this is a difficult question to answer.

host: haha why? it& #39;s not like you two-

lwj: we coincidentally proposed to each other on the same day.

host: .......of course you did

host: wei ying, what would you say is lan zhan& #39;s worst habit?

wwx: if i say something he doesn& #39;t like, he pretends he can& #39;t hear me

host: is that true, lan zhan?

lwj: is what true

wwx: SEE

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