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1) I have really been enjoying watching my bush grow. It’s wild, her hair is much coarser and straighter than the hair on top of my head. Her tendrils are thick but straight and running my fingers through her feels like a stranger to me. And the men who admire her grey strands
2) They want all of me. The real me. Not the me that reminds them of a youth they cannot get back. Or their first times having an orgasm while watching porn. They respect that people grow and change and are still SEXY. And a complete turn-on. And necessary so they can breathe.
3) And yet, after mind-blowing phone sex I decided, I wanted him to get a little closer look. The other night I gave her a little curly fade. Sleek, bald lips with a lot of curl up top. So you can still feel all of my womanhood while French kissing me deeply.
4) We’ve been playing this game for a year now. Slowly building and getting to know one another. It takes more to catch my attention these days than a big dick and a flashy smile. He makes me laugh until I’m in tears. Tonight, I’m going to sit on his face. #singleinbrooklyn
It takes a lot to turn me on these days because you know, men are tra$h and talk their way out of pussy ALL THE TIME. After 4 years I have a nice little roster going. It’s like one day all the pieces fell together and my body just... turned back on.
I’m poly because I believe no one person can fulfill all your needs. I don’t want anyone be to be any less of who they are, or pretend to be something they aren’t to fit into my life. I am free and I want my partners to be free as well. Slavery is over. I don’t need to own you.
The part that has always been difficult to me is unlearning the selfishness of engrained monogamy. Not wanting to take responsibility for another person’s hurt or risk losing someone because you know they would not be okay with your choices so you lie to get what you want.
It’s one of those things, I KNOW I am not capable of maintaining a whole other person in my life full time right now. How? I enjoy the comfort of familiarity but I don’t want it to be messy. I also expect respect and will not tolerate bad behavior, gaslighting people red flags.
And I’m NOT going to change my mind about seeing other people. At least not right now. That scares some men. Threatens their manhood. That’s a scarcity mindset. Love is abundant and there is more than enough to give. And if we are going to do this, let’s be fair and equitable.
There is no room for oppression in Black Love; how are we going to handle one another with the same tools used by our oppressors? When they say it takes a village, let’s create our own village. Of lovers who are friends and friends who are lovers and no one goes hungry.
And mothers are rested and fathers are reassured and queer and trans children are loved.
