Here's a story about last night. And how scary some men can be. And why I do not trust "male feminists".

I went to an amateur comedy gig that's done in English to support my friend who was doing the hosting.

Natch after-club drinks happened.

I got chatting to a woman sitting next to me, we talked about loads of stuff, and we got onto the topic of men, women, and saying no. I said to her:

"the most powerful thing a woman can say to a man is no, and it nearly always ends in anger".

Honestly it was like fucking soothsaying.

At that point one of the guys, a typical young liberal American guy who had been onstage bound up to us and asked us what we were talking about.

"Feminism". I says.

"Ah, cool. I'm a feminist" He says.

I raise one eyebrow at the woman sitting next to me. Look at him dead in the eyes and say:

"No."

He looks at me totally shocked and says "I'm sorry, what?"

"No...." I say "Men can't be feminists"

The dude lost his fucking shit.

He started screaming at me. Called me divisive. Said I was talking bullshit. Told me that his mother and sister agree with him that he can be feminists.

At that point I was kinda thinking a mixture of "wow", "this is ironic" & "this is funny"

I don't know what my face was saying but I wouldn't be surprised if I was smirking at this point, number one because he kinda proved two points with one stone.

So after his comment about his mum and sister agree with him I say (totally chilled by the way) "Cool. They're allowed to think that".

HE LOST HIS SHIT.... AGAIN

"OH RIGHT MY MUM AND SISTER CAN HAVE OPINIONS BUT I CAN'T?... WHY?.... CUZ THEY'RE WOMEN?!"

At that point I was like...

"This is BULLSHIT". He shouts.

"This is *such* divisive BULLSHIT". At this point I was worried for his blood pressure.

And then.. wait for it... he comes out with a fucking gem. A gem I will remember until my dying day....

"SO WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO NOW I'M NOT ALLOWED TO BE A FEMINIST? VOTE FOR TRUMP? HUH? SHALL I GO AND PICKET ABORTION CLINICS".

At that point I was like, "dude, what the fuck, calm down" but I could barely hold in my laughter because the reaction was ridiculous and so..

was the logic.

At this point the woman I had made my what turned out to be quite a profound statement to got up and left. Because she was totally unable to calm the dude down.

And as she disappeared to the bar, two guys who happen to be Transylvanian Hungarians started talking to me. They physically placed themselves between me and red faced "male feminist" and ask me (in Hungarian natch):

"Are you OK?"

So I say to them yeah I'm fine but this guy is really annoyed with me.

One of them says "Fucking hell, what did you say to him? We had to come over because this guy seriously looks like he's about to stab you".

"No. Men can't be feminists" I say.

At that point these guys are like:

Anyway.

That's pretty much my story. The only think I'll add is that the dude went away after that cuz I was talking Hungarian, and these guys were quite stocky.

So yeah. The most powerful thing a woman can say to a man is No.

Especially if he's a male feminist, it appears.

Post script, this actually would be a great stand up routine wouldn't it?

I hear the comedy club do an open mic night once a month.