I finally figured out what the extremely haunted sounding rhythmic noise in my house at night is.

It was a creaky ceiling fan in a room I don't go into much. Doesn't explain that time Derek picked up a washcloth in the shower and it dissolved into thousands of tiny bugs, though.

Sometimes at night, there's scratching on the bedroom wall that goes to the outside. I don't know what it is. I checked for branches and things, and there's nothing there.

There's no evidence of rats or mice, and with five cats, I'd expect to find some dead if we had them.

Sometimes all five of my cats sit in a semicircle and stare at an empty spot on the wall.

Anyway, what I'm getting at is that I'm not a superstitious person, but my house is extremely fucking spooky.