the first time issei sees tooru cry, he's not actually supposed to. he stumbles upon him, in some empty classroom after school while he was returning to his own class because he forgot his textbook. hajime is there with tooru, as hajime always is. tooru's crying.

issei knows because issei sees the same things he would see if issei ever cried in front of a mirror: the clenched fists, the furrowed brows, all in an effort to keep from crying. issei knows that effort well. the difference: the arms around tooru's frame. the gentle hand in his

hair. the soft hushing in his ear. issei's never known that before: someone holding him as he cries. he's never known that before.

the first time issei sees takahiro cry, it was something he was meant to see. takahiro had *chosen* to let him see— chosen to be vulnerable in front of issei even though issei is about 100% sure he isn't qualified. it hurts. seeing him like this. it hurts. issei's never known how

to deal with sadness of his own; he finds it's even worse on the set of takahiro's shoulders. so he does the only thing he knows: he takes the memory of an empty classroom and two of his best friends, and he folds his arms around takahiro's waist. isn't sure if he should run a

hand through takahiro's hair, so he doesn't; instead he circles his thumb around his back. issei hushes in his ear. i'm here. i'm here. issei doesn't know anything else, except that he's here.

when hajime first cries in front of issei, issei doesn't even realize it. they're in the locker room after a long day, just the two of them. it's silent in a good way. issei's sitting on the bench and tying his shoelaces, hajime beside him. then: hajime shifts.

he rests his head on the back of issei's shoulder, the slightest pressure. issei is— surprised, and means to ask him what's wrong, but all hajime says is, just give me a minute. just one minute. so issei does. he doesn't know how to be strong for hajime, but he can give him

all the time in the world, if he wanted. issei feels his shirt get wet. he feels hajime tremble. he's silent in a good way and gives hajime his minutes.

literally part of a rant i made in kam's dms after reading their new fic about crying matsukawa. do give it a read!!! https://twitter.com/matsucockwa/status/1297300874843131904?s=19

the section that inspired it!! kam's fucking amazing