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the other day my dad and brother were out and my mom was really happy we were alone. she got so excited, squealing about "mother daughter bonding time~!!!"
then she said, "wait"— and proceeded to flounder with her words before asking me, "what do /you/ want me to call you?"
then she said, "wait"— and proceeded to flounder with her words before asking me, "what do /you/ want me to call you?"
this means the world to me.
my parents were the type who "were (barely) okay" with LGBT+ people, as long as it didn& #39;t apply to their own children. but these past few years, they& #39;ve grown & become so open minded and supportive, not just of me, but of all LGBT community.
my parents were the type who "were (barely) okay" with LGBT+ people, as long as it didn& #39;t apply to their own children. but these past few years, they& #39;ve grown & become so open minded and supportive, not just of me, but of all LGBT community.
i know i& #39;m lucky for this; many people don& #39;t have parents who would even own up to their abusive behavior or prejudiced actions. i don& #39;t encourage anyone who feels they& #39;d place themself in an unsafe situation to do anything close to what i did.
the other day, my mom showed me she was reading a book on "how to love someone with bpd"— not how to /deal/ with them, but how to love them in a way where they /feel/ loved.
when i thought about what my mom has said and done to me in the past, seeing that book made me cry.
when i thought about what my mom has said and done to me in the past, seeing that book made me cry.
my parents have been working to spread awareness about mental illness & LGBT acceptance in the east asian community for a few years now, and i couldn& #39;t be prouder.
this doesn& #39;t mean i forgive them for what they did to me, but it means the world to me that they& #39;re trying.
this doesn& #39;t mean i forgive them for what they did to me, but it means the world to me that they& #39;re trying.
you don& #39;t need to forgive your parents for traumatizing you. you don& #39;t need to talk to them, EVER. you don& #39;t owe them anything. family is only family if you feel at home with them.
rebuilding a connection does not require you to absolve someone of the pain they put you through.
rebuilding a connection does not require you to absolve someone of the pain they put you through.
i didn& #39;t start this thread wanting to make A Point or anything, i just wanted to share this nice thing that happened, but i got emotional halfway through ghfjdsf.
growing up, i didnt think there would ever be a time where my parents would love me without hurting me.
growing up, i didnt think there would ever be a time where my parents would love me without hurting me.
my parents aren& #39;t perfect, and they aren& #39;t in the norm re: asian vs. LGBT+ topics, but they& #39;re here, all the same.
maybe your parentswon& #39;t accept you, but there& #39;s people who will, and those are the people who /truly/ love you. you fall in love with a person, not a label.
maybe your parentswon& #39;t accept you, but there& #39;s people who will, and those are the people who /truly/ love you. you fall in love with a person, not a label.
sometimes, you need to change for the people you love. readdress your biases, your attitude, etc. that& #39;s what my parents did, and that may be what you& #39;ll need to do as well.
but if someone can only love you under certain conditions, that is a selfish love.
but if someone can only love you under certain conditions, that is a selfish love.
if someone can only love you under conditions where you& #39;re smothering the way you exist, that is a love that exists only for that person; an apathetic, one-sided, self-serving love. it is a solipcistic aggrandisement of the ego.
you do not deserve to be loved that way.
you do not deserve to be loved that way.
