When I was 9 I said to my mother I wanted to make movies. The struggle was long and real. Years of disappointment. Code Switching and blending in, getting in the business, undervalued, being told i should be happy with the career in front of me as a tv writer and that I had...

to make a movie to prove i was good enough to make a movie. Being under the belief the system would reward me for hard work. The usual bullshit your told to keep you in line so you can watch others pass you by. Being told not to be too vocal because being black and vocal...

...put you in a bad light. Be Docile instead of Be Water. And that shit was killing me. Found myself 45 years old. Ten years in. Still watching the people who got to be loud and boisterous get picked. Not because of talent, but “potential.” Another code word. Wellll...

I sat at my kitchen table with my then wife and said “If i don’t figure this shit out, I’m gonna be out of this business soon.” Because i don’t do comedy. I don’t do hood. I do drama. They don’t think black folk want to see Drama. We ain’t savvy enough.” No Lumet type movies...

...for us. No serious examination of black folks trying to just live. But I’m gonna make my goddamn movie. I borrowed money. I took a loan against shit. I called a high school friend. And when I told tv associates i was making a movie for what I could I heard...

...you can’t do it. Never mind Jaramusch and Spike and Leslie Harris and Marty Rich had done it. And ppl who i was hearing about like Ava and Matt Cherry were doing it. The system was telling me not to lose my place in line. But I hate standing in line. So i started shooting...

...in 2011. 200k cobbled from dear friends and some jobs and loans. And I made a movie based on my mother and father. Set it in the world of spoken word and hoped the shit would be in focus and the sound would be okay... when i was...

...Done thanks to a wonderful group of actors and filmmakers and my lovely editor (who would edit in a closet while on vacation) got thru with their magic, I had a movie for better or worse. 2013 i put more money into it to travel for festivals and then released it in theaters...

...bank account looking like a broke piggy bank. But i did what the 9 year old wanted. It ended up getting bought and I’m still in the red on it. But when I got a Facebook message from a woman in South Africa saying she watched it daily (bootleg)...

...or got DMs telling me that the movie gave them courage to speak up for themselves I knew I won. Did I get offers to direct? No. ‘Cause they still don’t think a drama is profitable if it got da melanin — even tho they’ve been proven wrong. But every now and then I’m reminded...

...the first step might not be just for you but for others. Because somewhere out there is another 9-year-old who might say “I wanna make movies when I grow up.” And he might see that movie and think it can be done. Why am i writing this?

Because my friend texted me this today. And it sits right in the middle of some studio movies. Funny how life works. Believe in yourself And BE ACTIVE and shit can actually happen.

All of you are trying to get in or climb up are reading the words of people who wanted to get in and climb up. Remember that. And climb.

Be your own change. Your own studio. Your own “system.” Because if you make it, you WILL inspire others. Trust me on that.

The End.