The Top 10 most important positions in the black community:

10. Church organist
9. Candy lady
8. Any old man referred to by his military rank (ie “The General” or “Sgt. Jackson”)
7. Guy who “coulda been in the NFL but...”
6. Highest-ranked hairdresser/barber (according to polls)

5. (Tie) Treeshade mechanic/Lady who “sells plates”
4. Old couple with perfect yard
3. Funeral home owner
2. Anyone who “marched with Dr. King”
1. Preacher known as Re’umm” ___ (if they are called “reverend” or “pastor” it doesn’t count. That’s just a nigga with a church.)

Honorable mention to:
Weed man
Boosters
Lawnmower guy
Sunday School teacher
Cake lady
black belts in karate
The woman who “will put a root on you”
And anyone who “used’ta be a big-time_____”