The founding fathers were morons.

Here’s why.

Thread.

Ah the founding fathers. Historical legends. Worshipped for their intelligence and foresight to prevent any future injustices within our society. More gods, than men. Completely infallible.

Now I’m sure some of you are thinking “woah there. Hold on. That’s a bit embellished”

And I agree with you.

So explain to me why our justice system still links all landmark constitutional decisions to the language of the constitution itself and the “original intent” of the framers?

Especially considering they may have missed one or two people with that “original intent” and were really only worried about a very specific population.

I’ll take “Rich, White, Male, Landowners” for $800, Alex.

But who are these “founding fathers”? Well, that depends on who you ask.

Generally the term founding fathers is described in a similar way to this:

So, that definition helps establish parameters for membership (sort of) but who makes the cut?

Well that still depends. The list changes with time, opinion, political pressure. Not to mention, the influential women who played prominent roles in the founding are often forgotten.

But the consensus is at least: John Adams, Samuel Adams, Benjamin Franklin, Alexander Hamilton, Patrick Henry, John Jay, Thomas Jefferson, James Madison, John Marshall, George Mason, and George Washington.

Any additions to the list is where opinions usually differ.

You’re probably familiar with most if not all of these names. But do you know what each one is responsible for or how they contributed to the founding of the country?

If not, you’re not alone. Most of us have vague knowledge at best on the subject.

If you do, gold star for you but please don’t leave a comment bragging about how smart you are. I promise:

Anyway, moving on.

Here’s a quick recap of what each man did to be immortalized by the American people.

*Warning: CliffsNotes version of the CliffsNotes version. This thread is already too long as it is. Also, I am not a historian and did this research independently.

J. Adams - Political activist, lawyer, helped draft Declaration of Independence (DOI) and was instrumental in it’s signing by congress, helped negotiate Treaty of Paris, 1st VP, 2nd POTUS

Jefferson - Lawyer, Politician, Author of DOI, 1st Secretary of State, 2nd VP, 3rd POTUS

S. Adams - Political activist and agitator, Led and Organized Boston Tea Party

Franklin - Helped draft DOI and Constitution, helped negotiate Treaty of Paris

Henry - Lawyer, Famous Orator “give me liberty or give me death” and is credited with kickstarting the revolution

Hamilton- Key role ratifying the constitution, 1st secretary of treasury and built the financial system the U.S. was built upon, lawyer

Jay - Lawyer, helped negotiate Treaty of Paris, 1st Chief Justice of Supreme Court

Washington - Commander of the continental army & 1st POTUS

Mason - politician, His concept of inalienable rights influenced DOI, His opposition to the constitution (which he refused to sign) is largely responsible for the Bill of Rights

Marshall - Lawyer, Politician, Pivotal role in determining supreme courts role in federal government

Madison - Politician, Developed the plan for three branches of federal government, helped ratify Bill of Rights, 4th POTUS

So now that we’ve reviewed each man’s key contribution and importance, I’m sure you’re wondering how I could say they were morons.

After all, those are some pretty big achievements. And you’re right! BUT, let’s take a look at their education.

Mason - Tutored and self-taught

Franklin - No formal education after age 10

Henry - Homeschooled till age 15

Washington - No formal education after age 15

Marshall - Some homeschooling, some academy, and 6 weeks attending college lectures

Hamilton - Some College, Posthumous Honorary Degree

Jefferson - No formal degree but did attend college. Received four honorary degrees during his lifetime

Jay - Bachelors at 18

Madison - Bachelors at 20

J. Adams - Masters at 23

S. Adams - Masters at 21

Side Note: While I cant find an average age of matriculation into college, at 18 Hamilton was considered “older”.

From what I can tell, 14-16 was a relatively average age for college enrollment in Colonial America.

Also, interesting to note:

“Now, hold on! It was a different time then!”

Interesting point. It was a different time. So the standards of the 1700s are clearly no longer the standards we use today.

And yet, we still use the opinions of these men as the gold standard for how our society is governed.

“It doesn’t matter what their education was, it only matters what they accomplished!” I hear some of you saying.

Also an interesting point. And yet, how often do working class people hold political office? Or even attempt to?

There is a stigma in our country created by the elite that working class people aren’t fit to serve. And the American people are so indoctrinated into this narrative that even a politician with higher education is still considered “just a bartender”

#shoutout @AOC

“It’s not cause she was a bartender,” the neoliberals say with exasperation, “it’s because she’s so young and naive.”

Hmmm. Let’s take a look at some of our founders ages in 1776.

Marshall 21
Hamilton 21
Madison 25
—> House age min 25
—> Senate age min 30
Jay 31
—> AOC goes here 31
Jefferson 33
Henry 40
J. Adams 41
Washington 44
Mason 51
S. Adams 54
—> Average age of House goes here 57.6
—> Average age of senate goes here 62.9
Franklin 70

“But, but, THEIR ages don’t matter. Yes, they were young but they recognized the injustices they faced and fought to create a better country.”

Explain to me then, why a large portion of this country rejects the cries of outrage coming from the younger generations?

Why they actively oppose and vote against the will of our nations youth?

Why older generations believe their age creates more wisdom and validity?

Why are the founders respected despite their ages but today’s young activists are mocked?

My grandfather would tell you, that the founding fathers were some of the most intelligent men of their time and that’s why it’s not the same.

And now we circle back to my original statement: the founding fathers were morons. If you’ve read this far only to see why I think that

You’ll be disappointed because I don’t. It was click bait. Sorry not sorry.

The founding fathers WERE some of the most intelligent (white) men of their time. And while many of them came from affluent families, a lot of them came from more humble beginnings.

I don’t believe we should take their words as doctrine (also some of them were garbage human beings). But I do believe we need to adjust how we view who is an “appropriate” politician.

We’re living in a society where no political experience is ok as long as you’re a billionaire.

Think about that.

Why as a country would we elect someone who not only has no understanding of laws, but absolutely no understanding of the working class?

Why don’t we have plumbers or nurses running for office?

Because propaganda.

We need to normalize electing (young) working class representatives. REPRESENTATIVES. They are supposed to represent you.

The oligarchy does not represent you.

(FYI I still think we should #BurnItAllDown but I’m being optimistic here)

Anyway, this thread took some unexpected turns but hopefully most of you saw where I was going with all that rambling.

TLDR: the 11 founding fathers that most people agree upon consisted of self-taught lawyers, activists, agitators, protestors, failed brewer (looking at you Samuel), authors, philosophers, and soldiers. Most were young with limited education.

Most wouldn’t be elected by today’s standards. Also, their 1700s opinions have no bearing on how we should govern ourselves.

But maybe we’ll see the 2020 version in the next #revolution and create a new government that works for all its citizens.

For anyone who is interested in information on the founding fathers being absolute garbage, @michaelbnewell shared this awesome and educational video on the subject (it’s 45 min but worth it if you’re into that sort of thing) You should watch!