Read on Twitter
Beginner's guide to the different parts of Twitter; a thread
Politics Twitter: Constant drama and infighting. This part of Twitter looks like the cyber version of a WW2 battlefield on any normal day. Civilians are advised to stay away for their the sake of their mental peace
Anime Twitter: Everywhere at once. Members, with their trademark anime character avis, are notorious for being absolute madlads (and not in a good way). Think how good an anime is, is decided by how sexualized its schoolgirl characters are
Gaming Twitter: 25 year old high school dropouts who won't go to college because they're scared of girls. Haven't ventured out of the basement for years. Can often be found moaning about how feminism is destroying gaming
Stan Twitter: Quite possibly the most toxic part of Twitter. Full of socially awkward teens who think forming parasocial relationships with pop icons is a meaningful alternative to actual bonds with real people
Kpop Twitter: Its like Stan Twitter, but ten times worse. Members, with their trademark Kpop idols avis, can often be seen plugging Kpop fancams under unrelated tweets, and occasionally doxxing queer teens and outing them to parents for insulting their idols
Astrology Twitter: Think astrology is as much science as maths. Half of the members took to astrology after a toxic breakup. Think character flaws are inherent in their signs so no need to fix them
Film Twitter: Never got invited to any parties in high school so decided to spend their time watching old movies. Watch the same movies as other people, but think they watch it in a better way
Sports Twitter: Enough said
Muslim Twitter: Galaxy brained geniuses. Can often be seen preaching Islam under the pictures of white girls. Think white converts will establish Sharia. Hate the Kafir West and want nothing to do with it, while sitting in New York
British Muslim Twitter: Subset of Muslim Twitter. Very high IQ, but in negative. Which means they give brain damage to the rest of the app. All members combined share exactly three braincells between them
ISIS larper Twitter: Teenagers who think throwing in random Arabic word while talking makes sound knowledgeable. Can often be found making maps about future Islamic states
Diaspora Twitter: Never fit in anywhere so they compensate for it by labeling everything cultural appropriation. Never been to the homeland but that doesn't stop them from writing ballads about the fragrance of homeland soil and the delicacy of mangoes
Hammer & Sickle Twitter: Genocide denial, but from the left. Jack off three times a day to Chairman Mao's pictures. Had they lived in USSR, half of them would have been in gulags and the other half would have made a living out of deepthroating Stalin's boots
Rose Twitter: Think socialism is when the government does stuff. Going through an existential crisis since Bernie lost so now they pass their time trolling Elon Musk
Anarchist Twitter: Have hated all authority ever since their dad grounded them once in elementary school. Think enough people not voting will abolish the state
Right Libertarian Twitter: Suburban sociopaths who think poor people should have just chosen to be born to rich parents. Support small government, but won't say no to a right wing police state
Radlib Twitter: Use the word "woke" unironically. Firm believers of the Gospel of Tumblr. Think not liking Wattpad is misogyny. Host of the weekly "Guess Who Just Got Cancelled" award. More 
Female War Criminals
Female War Criminals
Tradcath Twitter: Teenagers who think learning to cook and posting cottagecore pictures make them "traditionalist"
Neoliberal Twitter: Read 11th grade economics once and now think that Demand and Supply are natural laws of nature
Normie Twitter: Post random, boring stuff. Use Twitter as Instagram. Not worth following
MAGA Twitter: Facebook boomers who somehow made their way to Twitter. Still use it like Facebook
Hindutva Twitter: Spend their time whining about two thousand year old historical figures. Think Taj Mahal used to be a Hindu temple. Tried to cancel Genghis Khan. Can often be found simping under tweets by IDF
Shitposting Twitter: Chronically depressed teenagers who make memes buried under three layers of irony to take the pain away. Aren't really funny so they think no one gets their sense of humor.
Relationship Twitter: Weird and cringe. Often creepy.
Note: Never EVER take relationship advice from these folks
Note: Never EVER take relationship advice from these folks
Gay Twitter: Think stanning Beyonce and watching Queer Eye is gay culture. Horny as fuck
Sapphic Twitter: Spend their time fighting other sections of LGBT Twitter, especially Gay Twitter
Bisexual Twitter: Think everything, and I mean everything, is bisexual culture
New Atheist Twitter: Get a lot of bad rep, and deserve most of it. Spend most of their time fighting Muslim Twitter and tweeting FB atheist memes
Incel Twitter: Think sex is a basic right and the government must ensure it for all. Scared of girls. Downright sociopathic. If you see one, call the police
Agnostic Twitter: Centrists of the God debate. Think atheists making offensive memes is the same as theists murdering blasphemers
STEM Twitter: Think any subject not involving math is a subject not worth studying. Think science can answer metaphysical questions
Humanities Twitter: Strong overlap with Astrology and Radlib Twitter. Spend their time writing mini-dissertations on Twitter that no one understands. Everyone else hates them
Pakistani Twitter: Members spend half their time fighting over food, and the other half running hashtags demanding the lynching of random teenagers. Love Turkey more than any Turk. Think they're descended from Arabs. Obsessed with something they call "5th generation war"
Urdu Twitter: Half of it is poetry, literature and philosophy. The other half is ultranationalist, ultrarelogious propaganda.
No middle ground
No middle ground
Trans/NB Twitter: Strong overlap with Anarchist Twitter. Just trynna live. Trademark Picrew avis. Half of them migrated to Twitter from Tumblr
TERF Twitter: Suburban wine moms who think it's still the 70s
#Resistance Twitter: Hate Orange Man. Want a more respectable rapist and war criminal in office so they can go back to ignoring USA's problems in peace
Entrepreneur Twitter: Spend their time reading the same books rephrased by different authors, thinking they'd discover the secret to success. Obsessed with "the hussle". Think poverty is a state of mind. Never get invited to any parties
Muslim convert Twitter: Half of them are queer communists who think Karl Marx was a mujaddid sent by God.
Other half are homophobic crackers who want to establish Islamic Sharia.
Other half are homophobic crackers who want to establish Islamic Sharia.
Marxist Twitter: Can often be seen telling everything that moves to read Marx. Haven't really read Marx themselves. Justify the most galaxy brained takes by saying "Dialectics".
Policy Wonk Twitter: Trying to find meaning in life by poring over public policy documents. Make long threads that their friends retweet out of pity
Writer Twitter: Overlap with Humanities major. Show up to rap freestyles with relationship poetry. Friends are considering the nicest way to cut them off
*Humanities Twitter
Druggie Twitter: Doing drugs is their only personality trait. Think doing Xanax on the first date is romantic. Know the name and pricing of every drug that ever existed. Unemployed. How they get money for drugs is a mystery.
Witch Twitter: White teen girls from Christian backgrounds trying to add some spice in their life. Tried to hex the moon to get Apollo's attention. Can often be found discussing the nuances of whether white witches summoning African & indigenous spirits is cultural appropriation
(Anyone not being able to relate is part of Normie Twitter)
