Read on Twitter
i'm a week late to this, but let's pretend i'm not:
Moving Back in with my Conservative Parents at 24, A THREAD
Moving Back in with my Conservative Parents at 24, A THREAD
1/? so they don't eat vegetables?? is this a thing 60+ y/o parents do? just not eat anything that isn't beige or dessert?? my body is a temple ppl cmon
2/? Fox News is literally on 24/7. this is how I grew up so I just tune it out but there is nothing more satisfying than ignoring their hourly 3-5 "ugh liberals" sighs waiting for me to ask them what they're sighing about (y'know to start a fight) and me never asking
3/? went to mexican restaurant. can confirm father said "hole-la" and "grahs-ee-yass"
4/? this isn't anything interesting. it's just a reminder to my cousins who follow me that they are 
not to tell jim n carrie about this
not to tell jim n carrie about this
5/?
it's COMMA-LA guys.
it's COMMA-LA
it's COMMA-LA
it's COMMA-LA
it's COMMA-LA
it's COMMA-LA
h8 her correctly for pete's sake
it's COMMA-LA guys.
it's COMMA-LA
it's COMMA-LA
it's COMMA-LA
it's COMMA-LA
it's COMMA-LA
h8 her correctly for pete's sake
6/? WebMd has been referenced thrice today regarding my brother and his gf's pregnancy. I am concerned.
7/? the frustration in the household today centered on the fact that google/apple calendars should NOT be able to force you to know about other culture's holidays!! the pain of knowing about different groups of people!!
8/? in good news: my father has now made it through a full film (parasite) and series (pbs' resistance) that are fully subtitled and in korean/french 
family reading time tonight, at a glance:
me: The Woman in the Window by AJ Finn
parents: CONCEALED CARRY Magazine
me: The Woman in the Window by AJ Finn
parents: CONCEALED CARRY Magazine
10/? my newest tactic is playing with my dog and her loudest squeaky toy during my father's nightly fox news watching while ALSO holding a separate squeaky toy that I squeak in my hand every time someone lies/is racist on television
11/? found out recently that my dad asked my brother–who lives in town, how to change his zoom background to just be a giant NRA logo 
(brother said no)
(brother said no)
12/? we're back!
last night we explored they/them pronouns and how they are fucking valid. when asked "so are you gonna call me 'unicorn' if I want?" I said "hell ya mom, whatever makes you happiest and feel the most you" so fyi if you meet her: she goes by Unicorn
last night we explored they/them pronouns and how they are fucking valid. when asked "so are you gonna call me 'unicorn' if I want?" I said "hell ya mom, whatever makes you happiest and feel the most you" so fyi if you meet her: she goes by Unicorn
