Today, I learned a new expression the young people are using: slaps. As in, ”I love the new T-Swift recording. It slaps!”

Below are a few examples of how I, a dumb old white fart, will misuse this term.

”The new ’Fast Yet Furious’ film totally punches.”

”Ever since they changed the recipe, the Mel-on Wheels at TCBY merely taps. Clumsily and without direction.”

”The early work of Hoagy Carmichael thoroughly roundhouse kicks to the nards.”

”This God damned California roll buffets.”

”Katrina, your Jansport duffel bag three-fiinger death punches to some throats.”

”The returns on these Vanguard funds wallops.”

”Kyle, the street glow on your Camry schleps.”