AWKWARD A guy just did the cheeky tube “double shuffle” behind me, squeezing through the barriers so he didn’t have to pay (common scam, bit obvious when we’re social distancing). I gave him a hard stare so he knows I know. Now he’s waiting on the same platform https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😬" title="Grimasse schneidendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Grimasse schneidendes Gesicht">

He caught me looking at him again so now he thinks I’m following him. And it looks deliberate because we’re right down the end of the platform. He’s not the usual “shuffler” - older, in a shirt, with a bag, probably been working

He’s let two trains go so he’s probably waiting for the same one as me. No mask, whereas I’m just a pair of staring eyes fixed on his fare-dodging face https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😷" title="Gesicht mit Mundschutz" aria-label="Emoji: Gesicht mit Mundschutz">

He’s hiding behind a pillar hoping I can’t see him. But I know he’s there and I know he hasn’t paid

My train came and he stepped forward. When I went for the same door, he moved back, went up the platform but got on the next carriage! I can still see him through the join. Definitely thinks I’m undercover police or some secret service revenue protection agent https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🕵️‍♀️" title="Woman detective" aria-label="Emoji: Woman detective">

He’s gone further down the train so I can’t see him but I bet I know where he’s getting off because those of us who use that station aim for the front carriage because it’s nearer the exit https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🤣" title="Lachend auf dem Boden rollen" aria-label="Emoji: Lachend auf dem Boden rollen">

There is art and skill in the “double shuffle”. They hover by the barriers waiting for the right person to swoop in behind. Probably helps I’m tall because he’s less likely to be seen by staff or CCTV https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🎥" title="Filmkamera" aria-label="Emoji: Filmkamera">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="👮‍♂️" title="Man police officer" aria-label="Emoji: Man police officer">

I’ve paid for his journey! Am I his legal guardian or something? If an inspector comes is he going to say I’ve got his ticket?

KNEW IT Saw him get off at my station, watched him sweep straight past without tapping out https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😠" title="Wütendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Wütendes Gesicht">

SO BRAZEN Didn’t even try to hide the fact he was stealing a ride. Do I have to tap out on his behalf as well?? https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🚆" title="Zug" aria-label="Emoji: Zug">

AMAZING Came round the aisle in Sainsbury’s opposite the station and saw him getting milk! I just said “I hope you’re going to pay for that”. He nearly dropped it! https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😳" title="Errötetes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Errötetes Gesicht">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😳" title="Errötetes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Errötetes Gesicht">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😳" title="Errötetes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Errötetes Gesicht">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🤣" title="Lachend auf dem Boden rollen" aria-label="Emoji: Lachend auf dem Boden rollen">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🤣" title="Lachend auf dem Boden rollen" aria-label="Emoji: Lachend auf dem Boden rollen">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🤣" title="Lachend auf dem Boden rollen" aria-label="Emoji: Lachend auf dem Boden rollen"> #JusticeForTfL

BEWARE If you& #39;re dodging fares on SouthEastern Trains I& #39;m watching you!! https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="👀" title="Augen" aria-label="Emoji: Augen"> THE END (I decided not to follow him home but look forward to seeing him again on the train next week, maybe he can pay for my journey)