One under-discussed emotional aspect of the dialogue between older and young women about feminism is the irritation older women experience watching young women go through the process of fully grokking patriarchy.

You can witness the irritation- see it in facial expressions, hear it in vocal tone- but I think older women are often caught off guard and unsure what to do with the irritation they experience. Young women feel it and often chalk it up to jealousy.

Some jealousy is probably in the mix, but I think for older women there’s often legitimate fear of having their experiences and knowledge dismissed. It’s so painful to know bad things are coming towards a young person who is totally confident nothing bad awaits them.

Young women want so much mothering and celebration from older women, while older women often desperately want to warn younger women and have their leadership instinctually accepted, without having to trade mothering for the ability to lead.

I have not cracked the case for how to enable effective intergenerational feminist organizing, I just think we’ll have a better shot if we can all accept that it’s reasonable and expected to feel irritation with ppl who are in different stages of life.

Tbh when you’ve been through lots of bad shit that v few ppl have responded appropriately to, it hurts to know a young person is headed for the same bad shit AND it hurts to consider that they might, through sheer luck, avoid some of the bad shit.