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((All joking aside I really don& #39;t know what& #39;s going on with me r/e forgetting Basic Shit in RPs. I genuinely don& #39;t know if I& #39;m just more self-critical of small mistakes, or if I& #39;m actually Becoming Stupid b/c of stress, yet I& #39;m not that stressed, I think, I don& #39;t know?))
((Maybe on some level I might have just become more aware of the complete normal loss of memory as time marches on, and the temporality of everything without exception is upsetting.))
((When I get upset I tend to write more but the writing is kind of the problem here. I might take a step back for a few days. Maybe I& #39;ll write some more solos, maybe not, idk.))
((I& #39;ve come to the conclusion that what& #39;s bothering me is the effect it has on another people. I can& #39;t stand annoying people (verb moreso than adjective). I am a little scared yeah but I only realized I& #39;m not playing w/ a full deck /because/ of everyone& #39;s annoyance.))
((I guess what I& #39;m trying to say is... please be gentle? As dumb as it sounds, maybe don& #39;t tell me if a lapse happened or if it annoyed you? Is that even a reasonable ask for me to make? I dunno.))
((I recently realized that I self-deprecate a lot more than most people and 80-90% of the time it& #39;s a joke or because I think a dumb thing I did is funny. Idk if that causes ppl to ignore when I have serious concerns but I do indeed feel kind of ignored? I don& #39;t know.))
((It might, conversely, have people thinking that I /always/ dislike myself, and that& #39;s not true. I only dislike myself right now because I realized this thread has multiple tweets that end with some variation of "I don& #39;t know."))
((Anyway, I& #39;m lonely, my ADHD is getting worse, my depression/anxiety is coming back, my rosemary plant from trader joes died, I& #39;ve migraines weekly and I get brain fog every single day.))
((Jesus Christ I just realized I& #39;m gonna be upset if my cactus dies because I& #39;ve had the cactus for at least 3 years. I mean, it has no reason to die, but...))
((I don& #39;t think I& #39;ve ever been this emotionally unstable for, like, a decade. It& #39;s honestly bizarre to me and idk how to handle what could very well be Completely Normal Emotions.))
