I want to apologize to my husband and to my lovers. It was wrong to have sex while employed as an academic. I chose the clerical life freely, and I knew what I was signing up for. I plan to step down at once and run for mayor.

My preference, of course, would be omitting the vile act altogether. Failing that, an intermission in copulation lasting from initial postdoctoral employment to emerita status is a more than reasonable undertaking. I’ve let myself down, and I’ve let the people of California down.

(I was once having dinner with a recently-graduated student and her girlfriend, and was MORTIFIED to learn that some of my students learned of my transition when they saw me on Her. I was FREAKED, and the girlfriend was like “it’s not a big deal, profs are allowed to fuck.”)

Obvi, I was not *trying* to be seen by students on dating apps. That is literally the last thing I want to happen. Twice I have had non-traditional age former students (ie, my own age) message me about a date on various platforms, and when I tell you I have an anxiety disorder...

Also, and I’m not trying to boast, but I have had sex over the years with SEVERAL college professors (like, three or four I think) and on balance I would say that we are pretty good at it! So if you are *not a student* you might just bear that in mind.

I also am very aware (and have written a lot about the fact) that failures of safeguarding in academic settings have been catastrophically damaging over the last few decades. I am also concerned that LGBT ppl, especially gay men, are often the target of homophobic attacks.

(I know no more about the Alex Morse story than some quick searches reveal. He’s closer in age to Berkeley grad students than to me. I hope any grievances are investigated, and I hope that students being “made uncomfortable” without cause by a gay man is not counted against him.)

I will say, I have certainly seen str8 students believe that their “feeling uncomfortable” around gay faculty is itself evidence of a grievanceable action under Title IX. Rather than evidence of homophobia, which is what it has invariably been.

I’m obviously NOT taking about the Ronell case, where the faculty member in question should have been fired, and others should have been ashamed for enabling the “this is queer normal” defense. I wrote about this back when i still numbered my threads:

https://twitter.com/graceelavery/status/1033771623462055936?s=21 https://twitter.com/graceelavery/status/1033771623462055936