american whities will never understand the pain and embarrassment of getting mocked for your "weird" name

my legal name is of arabic origin so fuckin ofc its gonna be hell
not to mention the terrorist "jokes"...

im fucking lucky im white passing but holy shit when people learn the islamophobia really jumps out doesnt it...

SO like. its weird. its a very weird grey area. i do not consider myself white in the european way at all since i am close to middle eastern culture and architecture and all that but like.. im still white passing yk

my skin tone is rather yellow-y(?) so when i get naturally dark i dont look like a tanned white person if that makes sense.. like my skin turns a light yellow-brown? i still pass as white tho
would i even be considered a non black person of color?? idk man

im rantin rn at 1 am while waitin for my cat to get tired s i can sleep so this isnt really a coherent thread but god im just annoyed

also its so weird trying to identify your culture and ethnicity cuz where im from is like right on the border of turkey- its completely influenced by the middle east and while geographically it's not the middle east- culturally it is.. similar if not the same (1/?)

and not to mention our skin tones vary wildly, like my mom's friend who is also from the same country we are, looks arab while my fam is white passing. and people acually from MENA also visit often and live there and i know im middle eastern bc of populations mingling (2/?)