i miss shifting into the “getting ready” part of ur day. closing the work laptop or coming home, sweaty from errands and anticipating what the next 4-8 hours might be like. the chirp of bluetooth connecting, next is spotify, then the ping of a bottle cap hitting the counter.

rustling through your closet, uninspired, next is your dresser of tier b clothes — after that is your roommate or friend’s wardrobe, always more exciting. hollow clunk of heels on hardwood, soft uncorking of the mascara tube, rummaging thru purse: wallet, keys, ID, check.

i miss not knowing what might happen. new friends, old friends, an ex or three, someone attractive to stare at but not talk to and convince yourself that’s the same as “putting myself out there.” dark bar bathrooms, soft light in your friend from high school’s living room.