i’m so fucking tired. this thread makes me want to cry.

i just want to do the right thing and feel right about it. https://twitter.com/m_c_yates/status/1293300812001742855
i don’t know how much more nihilism i can take. i don’t want accelerationism. but there’s no way i can just turn a blind eye now that i’ve seen all this shit. i can’t pretend like it’s not happening and only worry about my own self-interest.
vote for Biden? congrats, you’re handing power to cop supporters, transphobes, ICE.

don’t vote? congrats, you’ve shown that you’re complacent with fascism.

vote third-party? congrats, you’re shrugging at either consequence for whichever of the two *actually* get elected.
nobody fucking wins.

and god forbid you try to look at Biden’s policies on his website, try to say “hey, 97% of Americans having healthcare doesn’t seem like a bad first step!”

because oh, of course, how could you be so stupid as to think a politician will enact policies?
“no politician will ever do anything good, and if they say they will, they’re lying. American electorialism is always a failure.

...anyway, woohoo, Ilhan Omar won the election! ...what? i mean yeah, she’s a politician, why do you ask”
why celebrate progressive wins? what about your self-fulfilling prophecies that nothing good can ever come out of the system? what happened to the good ol’ doompilled accelerationist hammer-and-sickle-handles i’ve come to know and love?!
i’m not sick of advocacy. i’m not sick of bumps in the road, of understanding just how long change might take and how i may not even live to see it.

i’m sick of the inescapable defeat. i’m sick of the fucking snark. the irony.
maybe i just need to unfollow every millennial on my timeline. maybe it’s something about them, because i sure as fuck do not see this bitterness in my generation.

i see anger, i see sadness, i see a drive. but i don’t see such a sad, pathetic, reductive admittance of defeat.
i despise having to battle with my empathy and what i personally think is the right thing to do. i fucking hate how impossible it is to argue with doompilled millennials who have been genuinely fucked over.
i think Biden’s plan of insuring 97% of America is good.

i can’t bring myself to debate someone with crippling medical debt on why i’m going to vote for the guy who will leave 10 million people in their position.
i sincerely believe good things can happen under a Biden administration. genuine first steps to real change, not just a return to normalcy.

i’m not ready to call it quits in 2024, but fuck, i think we can get on a good path by then, and keep going.
i just want to feel good about this. not even perfect. just decent. just even the slightest amount of optimism.
actual accelerationism is not popular outside of twitter and a handful of communist chapters. thinking that even 10% of Americans would accept that mindset is unbelievably fucking delusional.
“the entire country should just fall apart” is a concept that would result in an unfathomable amount of deaths. covid-19 twentyfold. fiftyfold.
imagine if you had a button that would instantly put American in the physical and socio-economic state of the end goal of accelerationism. you would know exactly what those states are and mean.

i sincerely doubt anybody with a single living relative or friend would press it.
whatever. end of thread. i’m so sick of talking about this. i don’t want to feel guilty about the possibility of ennacting the most left-leaning policy in the history of the united states.
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