The archetype of "privileged white bros" is just another way corporate America suppresses efforts to make our society more equitable and fair. Even people I know personally fall into this trap, with me! So I'm gonna tell everyone exactly who I am, so there's no confusion.
My ancestors came to South FL in the early years of the Civil War, as soft abolitionists, fleeing conscription. They settled in a remote area that they chose because it was beyond the farthest distance the army patrolled from the last outpost in the South.
They fished and built boats and traded with the Native Americans throughout the war and the Seminole wars to follow. They stayed out of it. Decades went by and they eventually had to name the place when it got a post office. That's how the word "Everglades" was coined.
They stayed there and fished and built boats and eventually rich people noticed how nice it was there. Al Capone and Teddy Roosevelt went on charter hunting/fishing trips with my great great grandfather, among many others. They owned land. Life was good!
Eventually a Yankee named Barron Collier came down and, through a series of land schemes aided directly by the government, he seized control of all the property in the area. My family was forced to sell what is now about $20B in real estate to him in order to survive.
Life was still ok. The town got bigger. My grandmother met a man from North Carolina, an unreconstructed FDR Democrat who went to Duke on a GI scholarship after the war. They eventually had kids, and the kids had kids.
My mom worked in a grocery store. My dad was a freebase coke addict who toured with the Dead. He was in prison by the time I was six months old. I wouldn't hear from him again for 30 years.
My mom had to live with my grandparents, on public assistance. We lived in a rich town, but our house was in the shitty part next to the housing projects. My schoolmates were the kids of millionaires, but we had nothing.
I worried all the time about being the poor kid. I was smart and hyper, so the doctor gave me Ritalin. It did nothing but shatter my natural wiring and eventually give me a fun eating disorder.i did poorly in school.
I eventually made it to the part of life where you have to be ultra competitive to make it, and was unable to keep up with kids who could afford private tutors, bribes, whatever. I remember failing assignments because they had to be done on a computer, and we didn't have one.
I smoked a lot of pot. I somehow graduated and after a year of working at a fucking Sbarro I saved enough money to go to college. I had to leave within six months because I lost my job.
I worked my ass off to become the manager of an independent retail specialty store that I dreamed of franchising in a mountain town somewhere. I built up skills, contacts, and relationships. Then online shopping killed the industry.
During all this time I was volunteering and working on Democratic campaigns. I knocked doors for Clinton in 92 and 96. Did a bit of field for Gore and Kerry, and helped out with local races.
I met my first wife in Gainesville, and decided to give up college again to move with her to take her first job as a prosecutor. My mom had married and my parents had bought a little house the last few years of HS. Things were ok.
My stepdad worked HVAC, crawling in 140 degree attics in the office buildings we decided we needed way too many of from 2000-2006. Then he had a heart attack. They gave him a sympathy desk job for a while, but then 2008 came.
My mom was a clerk of the courts. Her job was eliminated. My stepdad's company went under. Suddenly they had nothing. Around this time I got a job "in politics", sort of. A candidate I'd volunteered for won a seat in Congress unexpectedly.
A bit out of order: Before that, I was a precinct captain for Obama. I poured my LIFE into the campaign. I devoted all my energy. I drove around listening to the fucking Wyclef song. I worked hard, and "we" won.
Then OFA just disbanded entirely after the election was over. They scattered us to the winds and discarded the organization because it had served its purpose. We thought we were the vanguard of change, but we were just a tool.
The crisis deepened. My parents started getting scary letters from the mortgage company. But I had connections. I worked in housing policy! I could help! And HAMP was supposed to be for people in exactly their situation.
I called around. I talked to people in big important offices who only spoke to me as a favor to my contacts. They all expressed concern. HAMP was complex, but we'd get there. They thanked me for my support.
And eventually, I had the last conversation with that member of Congress, the one I'd helped elect, the one whose re-election campaign war chest had over a million dollars added to it because of my professional efforts, and he said he was sorry there was nothing he could do.
My parents lost the house. They moved in with my grandmother. I kept going. Got married. Tried to have a baby. That's when we found out that having children, like having teeth, is a "luxury" in America, not a baseline expectation.
Fertility issues are not covered by most insurance. We spent $40k on IVF. We failed 3 times and got pregnant once. She miscarried at 15 weeks, on my birthday. Since mental health isn't covered either, we didn't get the help we needed in the aftermath. Things got tough.
My grandmother died. Cancer. The best woman who's ever lived. I held her hand and her last words were "I love you too."

Because of provisions in Joe Biden's 2005 bankruptcy bill, the proceeds from the sale of her home went to the mortgage company that foreclosed on my parents.
My parents were left with nothing. My marriage fell apart, partially because of money, partially because my wife, after years as a prosecutor, began seeing politics in a different light. This was during Ferguson.
I got divorced. Spent all the money I had, and got my parents a place to live for a year, prepaid. Moved to Massachusetts to take a job that paid more to try and keep up with the debt. After a year, they were on the street.
I was working in a fairly high-level, professional job, making a great salary by any measure, but still absolutely drowning. Because that salary was supporting 4 people in 2 states.
They were in shelters for a month at the lowest point. Wore out their welcome at relatives. And finally they got stabilized. They moved into migrant worker housing in Immokalee, living with some great folks who are nevertheless in conditions that most liberals would find shocking
And the years they spent there were honestly great. They got back on their feet. My mom said it was incredibly relaxing to have neighbors that weren't all just trying to impress one another or snitch or gossip. Just regular people.
My stepdad saved money from working at a grocery store. They were eventually able to buy a house in a rural area. They're starting over in their 60's. And man, does it seem unfair.
So when you tell at someone about their "privilege", I don't know, maybe think first. Because I see my life through the lens of government failing me and my loved ones when I needed it most. And I understand that is simply magnified for people less fortunate.
If I, a white guy born in paradise, has so much pain from bipartisan decisions made by the people still in charge, how can you say I don't understand the pain of black families, of women, of whoever? We all feel the same fucking pain, man.
It sucks for me! And I know it sucks 10x more for POC, women, everyone! That makes me really mad for them, this is not hard to figure out! My pain doesn't cancel theirs out. We all feel it together. We always have.
All the shit I described; that's a "privileged" life in America. And I'm not being sarcastic. I had it like, average! I know MANY people who had it worse! But is this ok? Should my life be the baseline? Is that what this country is about?
I'm great now. I have an amazing wife and a beautiful new son who is everything to me. But goddamnit, I want him to grow up in a world where he doesn't have the kind of problems I did, and neither does anyone else. He deserves it.
You can follow @tamrieldude.
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