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reasons why phone call anxiety is valid & why it exists:
- a lot of people with it grew up in an environment which created their anxiety, rooted from needing to perform perfectly or always say the right thing
- with phone calls, there's generally formalities and social rules. it leaves someone with anxiety worried about saying the wrong thing and being judged or even berated for it.
- it doesn't give the space for people to take time to think through what they need to say and be able to word it so they're perfectly understood. phone call anxiety feels very similar to public speaking anxiety.
- it creates more anxiety than face to face because you can't read the other person. it feels harder to diffuse tension or cope if you've messed up. people with anxiety depend on their ability to read people and know how they need to present themselves to be accepted.
- phone calls take a lot of control and comfort away. it's also inconvenient and there's anxiety about inconveniencing the other person as well as not having time yourself to spend on the phone for something that would take a few seconds to send as a message.
- gen z know how to call people and they call their friends. usually they do FaceTime because you can see the person and have all the social cues you need. we know how phones work so condescension pretending we suddenly don't know how to call someone is shitty. Don't do it.
- people with phone call anxiety deal with it. they might have jobs which require them to make calls. they might have to schedule their own appointments. they put it aside to make political calls to their representatives. they're not irresponsible or lazy.
- but if something makes them so nervous they feel like they're gonna vomit or I'm some cases actually do, i think it's very valid for them to avoid putting themselves in that situation unless absolutely necessary.
And at the end of the day who really wants to talk on the phone for 30 minutes just for something thst would take 30 seconds or less.
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