Okay fine, I'll summarize but then I'm getting back to work

Ethan Ralph from The Ralph Retort saw that some dude (who thought he was secretly the boyfriend of the 18 year old Ralph is currently in a relationship with) was streaming spilling the tea on how shes actually his. SO!

Ralph Instagram DM'd this dude a Streamable link. That link contains a sex tape. It's pretty clearly Ralph's room, Ralph's body and that girl. They're fucking. I will now attempt to describe the sex tape. You may want to tap out here...

He is on his back. She is riding reverse cowgirl.

Ethan's bulbous ocean of mottled flesh bobs and bounces like a rough sea being pounded by a storm.

There are noises, some sex talk. I got a few seconds into trying to decipher it and my reflexes drove screwdrivers into my ears

Anyway. At one point he sticks his thumb in her asshole and wiggles it around. She seems to vaguely notice. He then twists his amorphous blob of a body and the camera shifts so he can bring in his thumb and take a big ol' huff of that booty stank.

After about 4 minutes and 45 seconds there is terrible sounds (my ear drums grew back) vaguely like a disinterested otter chittering above a porpoise with smoker's lung. She leans forward and out flops a diminutive lil' feller of a weewee and you realize... he was raw dog.

Anyway. Yep. Happy tuesday.

After watching the detailed analysis from @Godwinson_ and PPP, it's clear Ralph also sucked on his thumb after sniffing it.

Gobbling up the tasty ass nuggets like a hungry little piggy. Yum yum. I'm in absolute awe this is real. Holy god.